18 UC Berkeley Essay Examples that Worked (2024)
If you want to get into the University of California, Berkeley in 2022, you need to write strong Personal Insight Question essays.
In this article I've gathered 18 of the best University of California essays that worked in recent years for you to learn from and get inspired.
What is UC Berkeley's Acceptance Rate?
UC Berkeley is one of the top public universities and therefore highly competitive to get admitted into.
This past year 112,854 students applied to Berkeley and only 16,412 got accepted. Which gives UC Berkeley an overall admit rate of 14.5%.
And as of 2022, the University of California no longer uses your SAT and ACT when deciding which students to admit.
UC Berkeley Acceptance Scattergram
This means that your Personal Insight Questions are even more important to stand out in the admissions process. That is, your essays are more heavily weighed.
If you're trying to get accepted to UC Berkeley, here are 18 of the best examples of Personal Insight Questions that got into Berkeley.
What are the UC Personal Insight Question Prompts for 2022-23?
The Personal Insight Questions (PIQs) are a set of eight questions asked by the UC application, of which students must answer four of those questions in 350 words or less.
Here are the Personal Insight Question prompts for this year:
- Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
- Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
- What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
- Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
- Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
- Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
- What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
- Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California?
18 UC Berkeley Personal Insight Question Examples
Here are the 18 best Berkeley essays that worked for each Personal Insight Question prompt #1-8.
If you're also applying to UCLA, check out more unique UCLA essays from admitted students.
UC Berkeley Example Essay #1
Uc berkeley example essay #2, uc berkeley example essay #3: clammy hands, uc berkeley example essay #4: memory, uc berkeley example essay #5: chemistry class, uc berkeley example essay #6, uc berkeley example essay #7: debate, uc berkeley example essay #8, uc berkeley example essay #9, uc berkeley example essay #10, uc berkeley example essay #11, uc berkeley example essay #12, uc berkeley example essay #13, uc berkeley example essay #14, uc berkeley example essay #15, uc berkeley example essay #16, uc berkeley example essay #17, uc berkeley example essay #18.
UC PIQ #1: Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time. (350 words max)
From an early age I became a translator for my mother anytime we went out in public. This experience forced me to have conversations with adults from a young age. It made me become a great communicator, while helping my parents overcome their language barrier.
Being a communicator has allowed me to lead. When I joined my school’s National Honor Society I was given the opportunity to lead. Applying the skills I used from being my mother’s translator I was able to do what no one else could, make the calls and start the club’s most successful event to date an annual Food Drive at a local Albertson’s, which collects over one ton of food every November. Also developing events like an egg hunt at the local elementary school, a goods drive for the Children’s Hospital of Los Angeles, and stabilizing a volunteer partnership with a local park. I have been able to grow as a leader, who actively communicates and brings parties together, planning events and having them run smoothly with minor issues. For instance, last year there was an issue with the homeless shelter not picking up the food for the food drive. In a spur of the moment solution I managed for club member’s parents to collectively deliver the food. My ability to communicate benefited me allowing me to find a solution to an unanticipated problem.
Throughout the four years I have been in journalism I have led; mentoring younger writers and improving the way the paper operates. Staying after hours, skyping with writers about their articles all helped establish my role as a leader, who is always supporting his team. I have done this while writing over 100 articles, editing tons of pages, and managing deadlines. I learned that while being a leader requires effort, it is the passion like I have for journalism that motivates me to lead in my community.
Being a leader so far in my life has taught me that I need to communicate, be passionate, and pass on my knowledge helping cultivate future leaders, who can expand and supersede my work.
- Improve your essays in minutes, instead of hours
- Based on lessons from hundreds of accepted applications & essays.
- Easy and actionable strategies
UC PIQ #2: Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side. (350 words max)
Video games have cultivated my creative thought process. When I was a toddler I invented a game I would play with my brothers. It was nothing along the lines of Hide-and-Seek or Tag, but rather, it was meant to mimic a role-playing video game. It was called "Guy" and came with its own story, leveling system, and narrative story. While seemingly impossible to translate the mechanics of a video game into real life, the "Guy" trilogy provided hundreds of hours of fun to pass hot summer days and escape the harsh reality of our parents arguing and eventual divorce.
This thought process translated into my educational career. have always thought of a tough class or test as a video game. This mostly due to my excessive amounts of video games I played as a child through middle school (especially 7th grade). Each year comes bigger and "stronger" challenges, bigger and stronger bosses to defeat. My senior year will have me face the most powerful boss yet; full AP course load on top of heavy club involvement and community college classes.
Many thought of this "secret boss" as an impossible challenge; something that could never be beaten. No one from my school has ever attempted to take on such a challenge, let alone defeat it. That is probably what excites me about it. In a game, messing around with lower level enemies is fun for a while, but gets boring when it is too easy. The thought of a challenge so great and difficult makes the victory even more rewarding. Stormy skies, heavy rain, and epic boss battle music; I'll take that over a peaceful village any day. In the future, I seek to use this thinking to drive research. I think of abstract physics concepts like secret door and levels that need to be proven true or just a myth in the game. One day, I can make my own discovery of a secret "cheat code' that can help everyone who plays a little game called life.
- Make a Strong Impression
- Capture Your Unique Strengths
- Write Outstanding Essays
- ...and Apply Confidently!
UC PIQ #3: What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time? (350 words max)
I’ve always hated the feeling of clammy hands, the needless overflow of adrenaline rushing through my veins, and the piercing eyes that can see through my façade—the eyes that judge me. I felt like this debilitating anxiety that I suffered through was something I could not avoid when doing the thing I was most afraid of—public speaking. I still felt every sweat droplet run down my skin before each speech, and this anguish never completely dissipated. Fortunately, I learned to moderate my fear in high school when I decided to join the speech and debate program. My anxiety has slowly faded in intensity as I’ve gained certitude and poise with every tournament, and every chance I’m given to speak on behalf of others; this talent has allowed me to be a voice for the voiceless.
Out of all the national tournaments that I’ve competed in, the MLK invitational holds a distinct place in my heart. It was my first invitational tournament in which I competed exclusively in Lincoln Douglas debate. I only had two weeks to prepare myself since it was finals week, while my competitors had upwards of two months to prepare. I was fortunate to break into the final round, as my years of experience helped me to articulate and explain my few arguments more effectively, while also refuting my opponent’s.
I realized that the extent of one’s knowledge is useless if it cannot be made known in a way that is clear to others. I learned that preparation is necessary, but one can be so focused on what they are going to say that they don’t hear the arguments presented. I kept an open and ready mind for various claims and strategies which left me free to adapt to the opponent’s argumentative style each round. This ability to think on my feet has served me well in countless debates, speeches, and presentations. I continuously use these skills to become a better and more active listener in my daily interactions as well.
My greatest skill is my ability to remember things really well, whether they be minute details or important information that should not be forgotten. Over time, I’ve had a knack for remembering details most people would not even bother to remember, such as old test scores, atomic masses, and other details involving numbers. My friends have always marveled at my ability to remember all these numbers. When I was in chemistry class, we used the periodic table so much that I soon began to remember the atomic mass of the more common elements, and even the molecular mass of common compounds like glucose or water. One of my best friends, who is undoubtedly the smartest person in our class, even finds it crazy that I can remember all these numbers and always tells me that my memory of numbers is amazing. I also used my memory to learn and remember how to solve the Rubik's cube, which amazes my friends, as they find it to be complex with many different, possible combinations.
This skill that I have developed, however, isn’t completely under my control, as sometimes I just remember random and irrelevant facts without really trying to do so. I recall one weekend when my eight-year-old cousin was attempting to memorize the digits of pi: I remembered them along with him, learning up to forty digits in just one day. The skill is seemingly natural and not something I have worked hard to develop, as I may be able to use my memory to my advantage, or it can be a disadvantage. It helps when I have multiple tests in one day, or a test with many questions where I have to remember a lot of information, such as finals. Sometimes, however, it is a disadvantage when I remember information during a test that is not relevant to the topic, such as random dates, names, or song lyrics, to name a few. This skill is very important to nonetheless, as it has assisted me all throughout my life in many tests and challenges involving memory.
UC PIQ #4: Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced. (350 words max)
At 10:30 pm on a hot, summer, Wednesday night, you would expect my friends and me to be having the time of our lives and going out on crazy high school adventures— but instead, we were actually stuck in a chemistry laboratory trying to map out the Lewis structure of sulfuric acid.
Over the summer of my sophomore year, my friends and I enrolled into ‘Introduction to Chemistry’, an evening course at our local community college. As a six-week summer course, I spent two hours in lecture, two hours in the laboratory, and another two hours studying on my own for four days a week for six weeks. It was evident that I struggled with adjusting to the pace of college when I received 19% on a quiz. I felt left behind, exhausted, and overall pathetic. No matter how many hours I spent studying, I couldn’t keep up. But instead of giving up, I picked up certain strategies like reading the material the night before, rewriting my notes, and joining a study group; eventually working my way up to a B.
At the end of that summer, I learned so much more than just chemistry. On top of having the raw experience of what college is like, my chemistry experience taught me that it is okay to fail. I discovered that failure is an essential part of learning. Coming to this realization inspired me to take more college courses and rigorous courses in high school. I transformed into a hungry learner, eager to fail, learn, and improve. By seizing the opportunity to take this course, I pushed myself beyond my limits. This experience and realization changed how I wanted to pursue the rest of high school, college, and life in general.
I walked into my first day of the chemistry class expecting to walk out with an A; but thankfully, I didn’t. Instead, I walked out of that class with a taste of the college experience and a principle that I now live by-- that it is okay to fail, as long as you get back up.
The relationship I cultivated with my school's college center, by simply being inquisitive, has been most significant. Over my years in high school the college center became my 2nd home, where I learned about extra opportunities and triumphed with help from counselors.
For instance, with help from my school’s college center I applied and was accepted as an LAUSD Superintendent Summer Scholar this past summer. The program selected 15 juniors out of over 450 applicants to work in one of 15 departments, and I was chosen to work for the communications department, which received over 70 applications – making me 1 of 70. Interning for LAUSD at their 29 floor high rise was very eye-opening and exposed me to working in communications alongside seasoned professionals. The opportunity gave me the chance to meet the Superintendent and school board members, who are politically in charge of my education. As part of the communications department I learned how the district operates a network of over 1,300 schools and saw how the 2nd largest school district shares info with stakeholders through universal press releases, phone calls, and the district homepage.
I wrote several articles for the district publication and worked with public information officers who taught me the principles of professionalism and how to communicate to over 1 million people. Recently, I was called from the district to become a part of their Media Advisory Council working alongside district heads, representing the students of LAUSD.
Working for LAUSD furthered my passion to pursue careers in both communication and education. I have always had a desire to be a journalist and the internship assured me of that. I want to write stories bringing student issues from areas like mine to light. Being exposed to the movers and shakers that control education in Los Angeles has heavily motivated me to become an educator and at some point become a school board member influencing the education students like me receive.
Support from the college center has spawned opportunities like a life-changing internship and set me on course for a future full of opportunity.
“Give me liberty, or give me death!”, I proudly exclaimed, finishing up a speech during my first Individual Event competition for Speech and Debate, also known as Forensics Workshop. Public speaking was always one of my shortcomings. During countless in-class presentations, I suffered from stage-fright and anxiety, and my voice always turned nervous and silent. I saw Speech and Debate as a solution to this barrier that hindered my ability to teach and learn. With excessive practice, I passed the tryout and found myself in the zero-period class. All of my teammates, however, joined because they loved chattering and arguing. I had the opposite reason: I despised public speaking.
I was definitely one of the least competitive members of the team, probably because I didn’t take the tournaments very seriously and mainly worried about being a better speaker for the future. Throughout the daily class, I engaged in impromptu competitions, speech interpretations, spontaneous arguments, etc... Throughout my two years on the team, my communication, reciting, writing, and arguing skills overall improved through participation in events such as Impromptu, Original Oratory, Oratorical Interpretation, Lincoln Douglas Debate, and Congress. I even achieved a Certificate of Excellence in my first competition for Oratorical Interpretation -- where we had to recite a historical or current speech -- for Patrick Henry’s “Give Me Liberty, or Give Me Death.”
I decided to quit Speech and Debate because I felt as if it has completed its purpose. After this educational experience, my communications skilled soared, so I could perform better in school, especially on essays and presentations. Leaving this activity after two years gave me more time to focus on other activities, and apply communications skills to them. In fact, I even did better in interviews (which is how I got into the Torrance Youth Development Program) and even obtained leadership positions in clubs such as Math Club and Science Olympiad Through my two years in Speech and Debate, I believe I became a much better thinker, speaker, and leader. Taking advantage of this opportunity boosted my self-esteem and overall made high school a better experience.
UC PIQ #5: Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement? (350 words max)
Although many would say that hardships are the greatest hindrance on a person, my hardships are my greatest assets. The hardships I have overcome are what push and drive me forward. If I had not gone through the failures of my 7th grade year I may have been satisfied as a B or C student. It is easy for us to use our hardships as excuses for not doing work, however, this is a mistake that many people make.
Through my struggles and failure, I have realized an important truth: I am not special. The world will continue to go on and expect me to contribute no matter what I have gone through. Everyone endures some type of obstacle in their life; what makes people different is how they handle them. Some sit around and cry "boo-hoo" waiting for people to feel sorry for them. Others actually take action to improve their situation.
Through hard work, I have been able to outperform my peers, yet I know there is still room for improvement. The thought of actual geniuses in top universities excited me; I long to learn from them and eventually surpass them, or perhaps enter a never ending race for knowledge with them. I used to live an hour away from school. I would have to wake up and be dropped off at a donut shop at 4 in the morning and then walk to school at 6:30 am. After school, I would have to walk to the public library and stay for as long as it was open then wait outside and get picked up around 9:30 pm. I am reluctant to retell this story; not because I am ashamed, but because it is not important. It doesn't matter what hardships I have endured, they do not determine who I am. What matters is what I have done.
At the start of high school, I saw nothing but success. From grades to extracurricular activities, everything seemed to be going smoothly. However, as my sophomore year progressed, this wave of success was soon swamped by a wave of disillusionment. I struggled to perform in Calculus and as a Vice-President, but instead of looking for a solution, I looked for excuses. Ultimately, when I was forced to face my two F’s and my lost elections, the world came crashing down. The vision I had meticulously planned out for the future seemed to shatter before my eyes. My self-confidence plummeted to an all-time low. I thought my life was over.
However, my response to this failure was what would ultimately determine the direction my life would take. In the end, I made the right choice: instead of continuing to blind myself with a false narrative that cast all the blame off my own shoulders, I admitted to my own shortcomings and used this experience as a lesson to grow from.
In doing so, I learned to focus on the aspects of my life that I was truly passionate about instead of spreading myself too thin. I learned to face challenges head-on instead cowering at the first sign of difficulty, even if it meant asking others for help. I learned to accept and utilize my own differences to create my own unique leadership style. Most importantly, rather than letting this mistake define me, I ignited a sense of determination that would guide me back on the right path no matter how many obstacles I encounter.
Looking back, this tragic mistake was a double-edged sword. While it definitely leaves a stain on my record, it is also likely that I wouldn’t have been able to find the same success a year later without the lessons I gained from this experience. At the end of the day, while I still grimace every time I contemplate my sophomore year, I understand now that this mistake is what has allowed me to develop into the person I am today.
Throughout my childhood, I grew up in a nine-person household where the channels of our TV never left the Filipino drama station and the air always smelled of Filipino food. But the moment I left home, I would go to a typical suburban elementary school as an average American kid at the playground. I grew up in a unique position which I both love and hate: being a second-generation Filipino American.
I love being a second-generation immigrant. I have the best of both worlds. But I also hate it. It chains me to this ongoing struggle of living under the high expectations of immigrant parents. How could I hate the part of me that I loved the most?
Growing up, I lived under the constant academic stress that my parents placed on me. Their expectations were through the roof, demanding that I only bring home A’s on my report card. My entire academic career was based on my parent’s expectations. Their eyes beat down on every test score I received. I loved them so much, but I could only handle so much. The stress ate me alive, but I silently continued to work hard.
Living under this stress is the biggest ongoing challenge of my life thus far. Until last year, I never understood why my parents expected so much from me. Finally being old enough to understand my parent’s point of view, I realize that they set these high expectations in the hopes that one day, all of the pain and struggles it took to get to America will pay off. Since then, I’ve overcome the high expectations of my parents by converting their pressure into a fireball of ambition and motivation, deeply ingrained in my mentality.
This intense desire to succeed in America as a second-generation immigrant is something that has and always will fuel my academic drive. As the first person in my family to go to college in America, I’ve made it my life aspiration to succeed in academics in the honor of my family-- a decision made by me.
UC PIQ #6: Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom. (350 words max)
Understanding the past helps us make better choices in today’s society. History provides us with the views of people and politics, the ethnic origin of people, and much more. At the base of all history, there is an intensive culmination of research which hopes to address or bring light to a story.
My passion for history began while digging deep into own family’s story, researching the history of Latin America, and the origins of the city I was raised in.
For example, when I first saw my favorite show Avatar The Last Airbender, I spent hours researching the mythology of the show which in the process made me learn about the philosophy of China: daoism, Confucius, and the mandate of heaven. Anything can be put within a historical framework to understand the context; every decision, tv show, and law has a history and that is exactly what I love. History forces us to take into account the voices of the past before we can attempt to plan for the future.
History has helped me become a more effective writer for the school paper. It has made me think like a attorney, revisiting old cases, and writing up a winning argument in a mock trial. Thinking like a historian has helped me make sense of the current political climate and motivated me to help start Students For Liberty, at my school’s campus where political ideologies are shared respectfully.
Learning, about history drives my inquisitive nature — I demonstrated this desire by volunteering at a local museum to learn more about the origins of my community in Carson. Ultimately, learning about the Dominguez family who established the Harbor Area of LA.
In terms of academics and performance, I have passed both of my history AP exams in World and U.S. history — being the 2nd person in my school’s history to do so. Studying history in highschool has nurtured my love for social science, which I hope to continue in college and throughout my life.
Ever since I was little, I have possessed a unique fascination for nature and the way it interacts with itself. As I sat in the prickly seats of old tour buses and the bilingual tour guide has silenced himself for the dozens of passengers that have closed their curtains and fallen into deep slumber, I would keep my eyes glued to the window, waiting to catch a glimpse of wild animals and admiring the beautiful scenery that mother nature had pieced together. At Outdoor Science Camp, while most of my friends were fixated on socializing and games, I was obsessed with finding every organism in the book. Nothing else caught my attention quite like ecology.
As high school dragged on and the relentless responsibilities, assignments, and tests washed away the thrill of learning, ecology was one interest that withstood the turmoil. At the end of a draining day, I would always enjoy relaxing to articles detailing newly discovered species or relationships between species.
This past summer, I was able to further this interest when a unique opportunity to volunteer abroad caught my eye. Flying over to the beautiful tropical shorelines of the Dominican Republic, I was able to dive into the frontlines of the battle against climate change, dwindling populations, and habitat destruction brought about by mankind, and I enjoyed every moment of it.
While everyone was obviously ecstatic about snorkeling in the crystal blue waters, only I was able to retain that same excitement about trekking through knee thick mud and mosquito infested forests to replant mangrove trees. While tracking animal populations, my heart leaped at the sight of every new species that swam right in front of my eyes. Even when it came to the dirty work of building structures to rebuild coral and picking up trash along the beach, I always found myself leading the pack, eager to start and do the most.
From this experience, I realized that pursuing the field of ecology was what I could picture myself doing far into the future, and this was how I was going to impact the world.
UC PIQ #7: What have you done to make your school or your community a better place? (350 words max)
Originally I saw volunteer work as a nuisance. I felt that it was an unnecessary "requirement" for college. I felt that someone decided to do volunteer work while in high school and now it has become the norm and is essentially required for college. Once I began to get involved, however, I found a true appreciation for the work I was doing.
I loved helping people and, as always, wanted to challenge myself. I worked at the Bellflower Volunteer center and tutored kids every day available, as well as helping out with large special events put on by the city. I then joined Key Club and made it my mission to attend every single event no matter what; even going to the lengths to walk for 4 hours starting at 5 in the morning (it was still dark outside) for a 2-hour beach clean up. I then became Service Event Coordinator and also made it my mission to have an event every week, while attending all of them, while still working at the Volunteer Center. I also started a tutoring program in math at my school as I really enjoy helping my peers academically.
It always warmed my heart to see fellow ninjas( our division mascot) at events I had planned, friends and neighbors at Bellflower events, and CSF members at tutoring.I am always willing to help people with anything. If someone needs my help I will stop whatever I am doing to help in any way that I can. Lending a helping hand is an important part of our society; however, a helping hand cannot do anything if the other hand does not reach for it as well. We need to be able to help ourselves first before others can help us. I tried to create a community where I could help people, but also people could help themselves so that there is no reason for anyone to not be able to achieve their goals and aspirations.
Throughout my childhood, the phrases “get good grades” and “make money” constantly harassed my every waking moment. Life seemed pointless, a never-ending cycle of trying to make more money to create artificial happiness. However, through partaking in my middle school’s ASB, I discovered my love for helping others, and I realized that I wanted to make my life about changing the world and leaving behind a better future for the generations to come.
In an attempt to live up to this philosophy, I have performed hundreds of hours of community service. From volunteering at a senior home to distributing food to the homeless, there is no doubt that I have made a substantial impact on those around me.
Despite all this, my most significant contributions are the ones that take place every day and are often undocumented. Picking up trash, staying long after my job is complete to help other groups, or even saying, “Thank you. Have a nice day,” to anyone who has provided a service for me are just a few examples. While they seem insignificant, these small actions add up.
However, above all, my biggest contribution is building meaningful connections with the people around me and making sure they realize how special and important they are to me and everyone else. In nurturing those who are less experienced, assisting those who are struggling with their emotions or their studies, and inspiring those who have untapped potential, I am not merely applying a band-aid on a wound, but elevating a whole community around me to tackle and prevent ailments the next decades will bring.
Years from now, I will likely have forgotten about my modest academic achievements. However, the memories of seeing someone I had mentored blossom into a strong leader and the smiles and laughter of someone I’ve helped battle through depression will forever be ingrained in my mind.
Serving food at school carnivals, embellishing the local marsh, tutoring students after school, and discharging patients at my local hospital were some of the ways I actively supported my city. However, a distinct way of being engaged in my community involved being selected for the Youth Development Program last summer. This organization works with the Torrance Refinery and selects thirty out of hundreds of applicants. The first week of this program involved activities that trained students for college and eventually their careers by making them adept in communication, leadership, and teamwork skills. For the next four weeks, students were assigned a specific job around the City of Torrance and Torrance Unified School District (TUSD).
I was placed in the TUSD Information Technology Department, along with six other students, and we essentially helped deal with technology-based issues around the district. Even though my professional desire incorporates biology and chemistry, I had a compelling interest and math and technology. I gave back to my community by utilizing the technological skills I gained at work. My colleagues and I traveled daily to several schools around the district and assisted in technological advancements: testing network ports and preparing schools for newer phones, imaging and updating new laptops and desktops, and arranging and setting up new computer labs and Chrome book carts.
Today, many people globally use technological and visual aids to assist their education. My summer job also allowed me to make a difference in the education of others. With the faster internet, newer telephones and computers, teachers could instruct more efficiently and students can be educated more effectively, thus improving their academic performance in the future. This program helped me a lot by boosting my teamwork and leadership skills, which will be extremely valuable as I will be pursuing many president/vice-president positions in my senior year. However, this program has allowed me to make a stronger impact on other people rather than myself; I feel delighted that my work in summer will be beneficial to twenty-thousand students across Torrance.
UC PIQ #8: Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California? (350 words max)
In 2011, I started at a newly built school spanning sixth to twelfth grade. The school’s inception was not the greatest with gang culture and issues plaguing the school and nearby community. From this moment I knew wanted to make a change, improving the school and local community.
For example, two years ago a bicyclist was crushed by a container truck across the street from my school, several peers of mine and I advocated for a bike lane to get installed on the street to protect cyclists from the busy traffic. I worked day and night for three weeks using my connection with the city’s public works director to meet with city officials and make a change. I looked for solutions and ways to improve my community and lead the charge to better our street. When we met with city officials they agreed and ultimately approved our bike lane proposal. This civic action started with a group of three concerned high school students, in which I helped facilitate the conversations resulting into a bike lane project, that will be built the summer of 2018 after I graduate high school. Ultimately helping solve an issue in my community.
Using my influence as part of the Associated Student Body I advocated for a new medical academy on my school’s campus to address the growing interest in medicine and health careers of many students at my school. While I am not personally interested in a health related field, I recognized that many students at my school did and teachers agreed. I came in as an intermediary, who because of my position in ASB was also a member of my School’s Shared Leadership Council (SLC), through these means I motivated other ASB officers to support the academy’s inception and after a grueling amount of meetings in which we went through logistics the academy was approved for the benefit of students.
I am a student who will attend a UC pursuing my passions in journalism, education, and history; while being an involved student making the campus a better place than when I first arrived.
Rather than relying on pure intellect, I choose to excel through continual self-improvement, my ability to overpower obstacles, and an unrelenting force of determination. There are thousands of students smarter than me, students with better test scores, students with more volunteer hours, and quite possibly, a more socially acceptable sense of humor. I can assert, however, that my determination and ambition is hard to match.
I am willing to look in the face of the impossible without fear; in fact, the only emotion flowing through my body would be excitement. There are thousands of intelligent students, however many are unable or are unwilling to utilize their full potential. Although not a genius, I have shown my ability to improve drastically in capability over time.
At some point in my middle school career I was not technically supposed to still be enrolled because my grades were too low; now I'm on track to be valedictorian of my class. I am willing to do whatever it takes to meet my goal; if there were a service event across the country I would be willing to walk the entire way; if I could take a million AP's I would. I understand that it is a big jump to go from Bellflower High School to a UC in terms of academic difficulty; however, that is part of the excitement. I am not afraid of failure, it does nothing but make me stronger. Am I capable of making a jump of such a magnitude? It is not my judgment to make; I am only here to try.
The spin-the-wheel slows down and eventually stops at ‘try again next time’. That is, until I secretly push it one slot over to ‘princess tiara’. As the child hurries away to the next carnival game with the tiara in her hair, her mom turns back at me with a warm smile and mouths the words “thank you”. Seeing genuine happiness in the people of my community while volunteering at events such as my school carnival always remind me why I love my community so much.
I hold a lot of pride in how I’ve become a prominent figure in my community. From volunteering at festivals for my local elementary school to becoming employed by the City of American Canyon Parks and Recreation Department, I relish being in the hub of the community. I love our annual Fourth of July parades and Easter egg hunts, where I am stopped every 15 minutes to catch up with the crazy kids I worked with at summer camp or even just with the staff I’ve met from school. Growing up and connecting with such a diverse community is and will always be a large part of who I am. From kindergarten up until my senior year of high school, both my small community and I as an individual have grown immensely. By volunteering at local events, connecting with the people of my community, and finally getting employed by my city, I know that I have contributed to the successful growth of my community.
Although I really love my community here in the small town of American Canyon, I cannot help but think of the other great communities that I can potentially be a part of as well. I believe that by going to the University of California, I will be able to thrive in the liveliness of the communities that the campuses are well-known for. A major contribution I believe that I can bring to the University of California is integrating, being involved in, and building the school’s community so that both I and the school can grow together for each other.
What can you learn from these UC Berkeley essays?
If you want to get into UC Berkeley in 2022, you need to write great essays that help make you stand out. From these 18 Berkeley essays that worked, here are some takeaways:
- Use specific examples of places and events (name them) ( #8 , #17 )
- Tell a story ( #6 , #18 , #7 )
- Demonstrate your background, identity, or culture ( #3 , #15 , #4 )
If you enjoyed these UC Berkeley essays, you'll also like reading our top UCLA essays that worked. They answer the same PIQ prompts, but quite differently.
Applying to other public universities? Check out these awesome University of Michigan essays.
Let me know, which UC Berkeley essay was your favorite and why?
Meet the Author
Ryan Chiang
I'm Ryan Chiang and I created EssaysThatWorked.com - a website dedicated to helping students and their families apply to college with confidence & ease. We publish the best college admissions essays from successful applicants every year to inspire and teach future students.
You might also like:
18 UCLA Essays That Worked (and Why) for 2024
18 UC San Diego EssaysThatWorked
18 UC Santa Barbara EssaysThatWorked
12 Best Stanford Supplemental Essays That Worked 2024
What do outstanding essays have in common? Here are our 23 most effective strategies based on lessons from admitted students.
No spam. Unsubscribe anytime.
By signing up you agree to Terms and Privacy Policy
© 2018- 2024 Essays That Worked . All rights reserved.
Registration on or use of this site constitutes acceptance of our Terms and Conditions , Privacy Policy , and Cookie Policy .
We have no affiliation with any university or colleges on this site. All product names, logos, and brands are the property of their respective owners.
Think you can get into a top-10 school? Take our chance-me calculator... if you dare. 🔥
Last updated July 17, 2024
Every piece we write is researched and vetted by a former admissions officer. Read about our mission to pull back the admissions curtain.
Blog > Essay Examples , UC Essays > 9 Outstanding UC Essay Examples (Graded by Former Admissions Officers)
9 Outstanding UC Essay Examples (Graded by Former Admissions Officers)
Admissions officer reviewed by Ben Bousquet, M.Ed Former Vanderbilt University
Written by Kylie Kistner, MA Former Willamette University Admissions
Key Takeaway
We talk a lot about essays in the college application process. And for good reason. Essays are one of the most critical parts of your application, and the University of California Personal Insight Questions are no different. Even though they’re quite different from personal statements or supplemental essays , UC essays serve a similar purpose: to help admissions officers get to know you and envision you on their campus.
But the tricky thing about UC essays is that they have a very particular style and form. If you don’t write your UC essays in the right way, you risk tanking your application.
Writing them the right way, however, can land you in the admit pile.
Let's start by looking at an example essay. Then we'll dive into the prompts themselves, go over some strategy, and and look at even more examples. Ready?
UC Example Essay - Prompt #7
We’ve got an extra example for Prompt #7: . This one comes from the Essay Academy , our digital college essay course. It’s about a student’s initiative to bring literacy to their community. Take a look:
This writer makes it very clear what community they’re talking about. They state the problem (libraries closing down), their solution (filling the library gap through book club), and the action steps they took to make their community a better place.
Along the way, we clearly see their strengths: they are willing to take initiative and to think critically about what the community needs. The essay also answers the entire prompt and meets the style and tone requirements of UC essays. It’s clear, action-oriented, and to-the-point. Excellent!
Now, let's actually take a look at the prompts.
The UC Personal Insight Question Prompts
The University of California system, which consists of nine campuses across the state, requires students to apply directly via their institutional application portal. That means that you won’t be submitting your Common Application to them or writing school-specific supplemental essays. Instead, you’ll choose four of the following eight prompts to respond to.
Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California?
Once you have your prompts chosen, the essays themselves should be no greater than 350 words each.
Together, your essays should be different but cohesive enough to tell a fairly complete story of who you are.
Before we get to the examples, we have a few tips to keep you on track.
How to Write the UC Personal Insight Questions
Okay, so we actually have a whole other comprehensive guide to the UC essays that breaks down the process in extreme detail.
So for now, we’ll just go over the essentials.
What’s helpful about the UC PIQs is that we don’t have to guess what admissions officers are looking for—the UCs tell us directly in the Points of Comprehensive Review . Read through all thirteen points, but pay special attention to #10. That’s where your essays will be doing the heaviest lifting.
With that in mind, there are four rules for writing UC essays that you should stick to like glue:
Answer the prompt.
We’ll say it again for the people in the back: answer the prompt! The UC essay prompts ask very specific questions and contain multiple parts. If you misinterpret the prompt, you may end up writing the completely wrong essay.
You might find that diagramming or annotating the prompts helps you pull out the important pieces. Break down what each of your chosen prompts asks you to do, and list out all the questions in order. That way, you’ll make sure you’re not missing anything.
Skip the fluff.
Your personal statement likely has some creative descriptions or metaphors. You may have even incorporated figurative or poetic language into your supplementals. And that’s great. In fact, that’s encouraged (within reason, of course).
But UC essays are different. They’re all business.
Whereas your personal statement might open with an attention-catching hook that describes a scene in vivid detail, your UC essays should jump straight in. In general, your essay should be organized in a clear way that tells a straightforward story.
Focus on action steps.
As we saw in the Points of Comprehensive Review, admissions officers want to learn about how your concrete experiences have shaped you. That means that your essays should revolve around action steps rather than, say, 350 words of intense personal reflection. What those action steps should look like will depend on the prompts you’ve chosen. But by the end of your essay, your admissions officers should know what you’ve done and why.
Show a strength.
In the UC essays, it’s easy to get caught up in the details of the prompt and style of the essay. But don’t lose sight of the purpose of any college essay in the process: to showcase a strength to your admissions officers.
Every UC essay you write should correspond with a specific strength. That might be wisdom, artistry, good judgement, entrepreneurship, leadership—you get the idea.
Let’s say you want one of your essays to demonstrate leadership. The idea isn’t that you come out and say, “This shows that I am a leader.” Instead, by the end of the essay, after reading about everything you’ve done and reflected on, your admissions officers should sit back in their chair and say, “Wow, that student is a leader.” You’ll see what we mean in the examples.
Because of all these golden rules, your UC essays will look quite different than your Common Application essay or supplementals. They’ll probably look quite different from any essay you’ve written.
That’s where examples come in handy. Ready to dive in?
UC Prompt 1: Leadership
1. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
Prompt 1 Example Essay
When we moved to a new neighborhood, my dad always complained about the house next to us. Full of weeds and random objects, it had clearly been neglected(( Notice how, at least compared with common application personal essays, the tone of this essay is much more staid?)) .
I didn’t pay much attention to his complaints until one day when I saw that our neighbor was an elderly man. He was struggling to bring his trash to the bins outside. Suddenly, it all clicked. If taking out the garbage was a challenge, then surely he wasn’t able to do yard work. That’s why it looked neglected.
My dad always taught me that leadership isn’t about giving orders. It’s about doing what needs to be done(( A direct, succinct definition of leadership.)) . With this advice in mind, I decided that I would help our neighbor.
After my realization, I went and knocked on our neighbor’s door. I introduced myself and learned that his name was Hank. When the time was right, I informed him that I’d be cutting our grass the following weekend and would love to cut his as well. Hank initially refused.
Speaking with Hank, I learned that leadership is also about listening to people’s needs(( Showing a lesson from the experience.)) . In that moment, Hank needed to be reassured that I wanted to help. I told him it would be easy for me to cross over to his yard while I had the equipment out. He finally agreed.
The next Saturday, I got to work. The job would be bigger than I expected. All the objects needed to be picked up before I could mow. I decided to enlist the help of my two younger siblings. At first, they said no. But a good leader knows how to inspire, so I told them about Hank and explained why it was important to help. Together, we cleaned up the yard. Now, each time I mow our lawn, I mow Hank’s afterward.
Through this experience, I learned that leadership is about seeing problems and finding solutions. Most importantly, it’s about attitude and kindness(( The author of this essay does a good job staying focused on a clear definition.)) . The neighborhood is grateful that the eyesore is gone, Hank is grateful for the help, and I am grateful for my new friend.
Word Count: 343
UC Essay Checklist
Does the writer convey a strength?
Yes. The writer shows initiative in seeking out the neighbor and willingness to help in all the hard work they did.
Is every part of the prompt answered?
Yes. Since this prompt has an “or,” we know that the writer doesn’t have to meet every single criterion listed. They respond to the “positively influenced others” part of the prompt, which we can see through their interactions with their neighbor.
Does the writer adhere to UC conventions?
Yes. The essay is straightforward and clearly organized. The writer lists action steps in chronological order.
UC Prompt 2: Creativity
2. Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
Prompt 2 Example Essay
As a cellist, I express my creativity through music(( Directly answering the prompt up front. )) . Whether I’m playing in a symphony, chamber orchestra, quartet, or solo performance, I bring my art to the world with my instrument. My creativity has transformed me from a small child playing out of tune to a solo artist featured in my state’s youth symphony.
I’ve loved music from a young age, and I began playing the cello when I was six years old. What began as a hobby to keep an energetic child engaged has become my life’s purpose.
At first, I only played along with my private lesson teacher, Ms. Smith. I loved dancing my fingers across the fingerboard, plucking the strings, and making screeching noises with my bow. Ms. Smith told my parents that I had promise but needed to develop discipline. Despite my young age, I listened. By the time I reached middle school, I had made principal cellist in my school’s orchestra. Leading a section of fellow cellists brought my creativity to a whole new level. Not only was I expressing myself through my own music, but I also expressed myself through my leadership. With a subtle nod or an expressive sway, I learned to shape the music those behind me played. I felt most comfortable and free when I was playing my cello.
That feeling only grew as I moved into high school. In ninth grade, I landed my first solo. With it came a new creative sensation: stage fright(( This part of the essay distracts a bit from the main theme.)) . Until then, I’d only experienced positive emotions while playing. I needed to make solo performance more positive. With endless practice and exercises like playing for the public on the sidewalk, I learned that solo performance is simply a way to share my love of music with those around me.
Now, as principal cellist of my state’s youth orchestra, I jump at the chance to perform any solo I can get. Getting to this point has taken me countless late nights practicing in my bedroom and weekends spent in rehearsals. But without my cello to express my creative side, I wouldn’t be me.
Word Count: 347
Yes. The writer is an artist—a musician specifically. Their creativity shines through.
Yes. This prompt is pretty straightforward: “Describe how you express your creative side,” which the writer does by describing their love of the cello. Notice how the writer doesn’t just say they’re creative because they play the cello. They describe that creativity in detail.
Mostly. The short paragraph about stage fright takes us on a slight detour from the prompt. To make this essay even better, the writer could have eliminated that anecdote or reframed it to be more about creative expression.
UC Prompt 3: Talent or Skill
3. What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
Prompt 3 Example Essay
How many toes does an armadillo have? What were the main causes of the Crimean War? Who discovered atoms? When my friends or family have questions, they come to me for answers. I am an expert researcher. Although my passion for research began as a fun hobby, it has evolved into one of my greatest skills(( The writer opens with an interesting but not too out-there hook and then gets straight to answering the prompt.)) .
My first real mystery came when I was in ninth grade. My mom wanted to track down an old friend from high school but hadn’t had any luck searching on her own. Having grown up with the internet, I was my mom’s best chance. Not sure where to begin, I took to YouTube tutorials. Using the few family details my mom remembered, I tracked down the friend’s brother then found the friend’s married name(( Here’s a great example of what the skill looks like.)) . Alas–we found her on social media. I felt triumphant as I saw the happiness wash over my mom’s face.
Since then, my skill has grown exponentially(( And here the writer gets at the “developed and demonstrated the talent over time” part of the prompt.)) . Combining my natural curiosity with my love of history, I’ve advanced my research skills by volunteering with my local library for the past two years. I have learned about how keywords and search engines work, practiced cataloging and archiving, and waded my way through the intricacies of the library’s database technology. Suddenly, researching wasn’t just about finding people’s Facebook profiles. It was about having any information I wanted to find at my fingertips.
Access to information is more important now than ever. That’s why I decided to put my research knowledge to work. Part of being a good researcher is teaching others how to access information too, so I founded the SOHS Research Club. We begin each meeting by raising the hardest question we can think of, and I use the projector in the library to walk club members through my research process. Members have all gone on to share their knowledge with their friends and family. The SOHS Research Club has spread information literacy to my whole community(( Gesturing to the greater significance of the skill)) .
Looking ahead to all the ways my research skills will improve in college, I know that I’ll be ready to find an answer for anything.
Word Count: 350
Yes. We see that they’re not only skilled at research but also that they want to support their community.
Yes—but. The prompt asks about your greatest talent or skill . It also asks how you have developed and demonstrated that talent over time. The writer does answer these questions, but I’d like to see more about when the SOHS Research Club took place as part of this development.
Yes. The essay is clear, organized, and to-the-point.
UC Prompt 4: Educational Opportunity or Barrier
4. Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
Prompt 4 Example Essay
I jump at any chance to get my hands dirty. I am an aspiring ecologist. I’m lucky enough to live in a college town, so I was elated last semester when a postdoctoral fellow invited me to join her research team(( Okay, looks like this writer is addressing the “how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity” part of the prompt.)) .
Although at first(( Good signposting and transitions. UC essays should be clear and straightforward. This writer easily walks us through the step-by-step of what happened.)) I was intimidated by the prospect of working alongside college students and faculty, I decided to embrace the opportunity to learn what being an ecologist is really like.
The project involved studying Asclepias syriaca populations in my local park. More commonly known as Milkweed, this flower species has a long and important history in North America, particularly for Indigenous people. After learning about its history as a food source, medicine, and critical part of ecological function, I couldn’t wait to be part of the research.
As a research assistant, I helped with data collection. We began by using twine to section off population groups in the park. Then, every week I returned to the populations to collect information about population growth. I counted the number of flowers in the population, and, with a clear ruler, I measured and recorded the height of every individual flower.
The work was tedious. On my hands and knees, I squinted at the millimeter markings, trying to obtain the most accurate measurements possible. Each week, I’d return home with muddy jeans and a smile on my face.
Participating in this research project taught me that being an ecologist is about much more than looking at plants(( Going beyond the research to reflect on lessons learned—nice!)) . It’s also about learning from mentors and engaging with and having respect for the historical context of the plants we study. Being a scientist is also not as glamorous as movies like Jurassic Park lead on. Instead, science requires careful planning, patience, and hard work.
But what I learned the most from this educational opportunity is that science doesn’t exist in some nebulous place. It exists right here in front of me. I look forward to continuing to use science to serve my community.
Word count: 328
Yes. We see their intellectual curiosity and willingness to learn through their research journey.
Yes. We have another “or” prompt! This time they’ve chosen to focus on an “educational opportunity,” which is the research project. They certainly explain how they “took advantage” of it.
Yes. There’s no fluff, just a coherent narrative focused on actions the writer took.
UC Prompt 5: Challenge
5. Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
Prompt 5 Example Essay
While most kids fear monsters, my greatest fear has always been tests. Since elementary school, I’ve dealt with incapacitating test anxiety. I’d sit down for a spelling test and faint from anxiety(( Straight into answering the prompt)) . Math tests in middle school would make me run to the bathroom ill. By the time I reached high school, where the testing stakes became even higher, my test anxiety increased exponentially.
More than normal feelings of nervousness or anxiousness, it is a diagnosis I wrestle with daily. Test anxiety caused me to miss a number of tests that I had no option to re-take. It’s caused me to receive abysmal scores on standardized and state tests, which has had repercussions in the classes I’m allowed to take(( Strategically, this was a good prompt for this student to answer because it gives them a way to contextualize any poor grades they earned early in high school. It also gets at the “academic achievement” part of the prompt.)) . My test anxiety has been the greatest challenge of my life. In a school system so reliant on testing, it has completely affected my ability to achieve academically.
By the time I took the PSATs, I couldn’t even move my hand to write my name. I knew something had to change. I reached out for help. My mom knew I had been struggling but didn’t understand the extent of my illness. Together, we contacted my school counselor, who told us how to find a therapist.
With my doctors, I worked to mitigate the effects of my test anxiety on a medical and psychological level(( Action steps! This prompt requires you to talk about the specific steps you took to overcome the challenge. The writer does exactly that in this paragraph.)) . I began taking beta-blockers that helped slow my heart rate, thus tricking my body into being less anxious. Alongside that, I spent months working through the reasons my brain interpreted testing as such a threat. I learned to appreciate my intrinsic value instead of relying on external factors like test scores. And rather than viewing tests as chances to fail, I began to understand them as opportunities to showcase my growth.
Now, after two long years of effort, I can take any test with ease. Since learning how to manage my disorder, I’ve successfully taken my driver’s test, SATs and ACTs, and all seven of my AP exams. I’m looking forward to all the tests I’ll take in college(( And we end on a very positive note that shows lots of growth)) .
Yes—which is difficult with this prompt. The writer doesn’t get bogged down in the challenge of having test anxiety. Instead, they use this prompt as an opportunity to show a strength: resilience to overcome such a difficult problem.
Yes. And this prompt has multiple parts, too. It wants you to describe 1) a challenge, 2) the steps you’ve taken to overcome the challenge, and 3) how the challenge affected your academic achievement. This writer does all three.
Yes. The writer doesn’t provide any poetic descriptions or metaphors. They say what they mean.
UC Prompt 6: Academic Interest
6. Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
Prompt 6 Example Essay
Sitting in front of my baby cousin, I held my hands in front of my face. I quickly snapped them down and exclaimed, “Peek-a-boo!” Delighted, he erupted into laughter. From the perspective of my more developed brain, this game is quite boring. It’s overly repetitive, and the outcome—my face reveal—is basic and consistent. But to a brain that hasn’t yet gone through the sensorimotor phase of development, the game is a downright hoot. What I perceive as boring is actually magic to a baby’s mind. Without the concept of object permanence, my cousin thinks that I disappear completely behind my hands. When my face returns, he marvels as I inexplicably materialize in front of him. It’s no wonder he can play peek-a-boo for hours.
Since I took IB Psychology my sophomore year, I have been fascinated with child psychology(( It takes a paragraph before we get to the prompt (which is too long), but I like the nerdiness the writer shows in the intro)) . No matter when or where we are born, we all undergo similar stages of development that help us understand the world around us. Imagine Albert Einstein chewing on a rock or Genghis Khan taking his first steps. Researching child development unlocks something universal and equalizing about the human experience.
Because of my interest in child psychology, I decided to get more involved with my community. I began by volunteering in a psychology lab at my local university. While there, I get our child participants settled before sessions. Occasionally I get to help with data collection. I also landed a job as a teacher’s aide at a nearby Head Start, where I feed lunches, play, and read. In both of these activities, I’ve learned so much about how to interact with toddlers, to think like they think, and to help them grow into kind and happy children(( This paragraph shows exactly how they’ve furthered their interest.)) .
My school doesn’t offer any additional psychology courses, so I took a community college class this summer. I’m looking forward to taking more advanced psychology classes as a psychology major, and I’m eager to bring the research skills I’ve been developing to one of the UC’s many child development labs. One day, I hope to use all these skills as a child therapist.
Word Count: 348
Yes. The student is very intellectually curious about child development—a perfect strength for this prompt.
Yes. The writer talks about an academic subject, child development, and describes how they advanced that interest through a research lab, classes, and a job at Head Start.
Yes—but. Overall, the essay does a great job adhering to UC essay conventions. But the first paragraph almost doesn’t. As it is, the writer stays focused on telling the story. However, it takes up quite a bit of space in the essay without really conveying much about the writer’s journey. If there were a metaphor or any poetic language in there, it would have been too far. Same goes for the snippet about Einstein and Genghis Khan—it adds personality but is close to overdoing it.
UC Prompt 7: School or Community
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
Prompt 7 Example Essay
Nourishing loved ones by cooking for them is one of my biggest passions. But my hobby has become more difficult since moving to a food desert. Food deserts are areas without easy access to grocery stores or healthy foods. These disparities are clear in the school cafeteria, with the majority of students eating processed school lunches or packaged foods brought from home. I decided to do something about it.
The idea came to me one day as I made my way from AP Biology to my cooking elective. We needed a school community garden(( The writer sets up the stakes in the introduction so we truly understand the situation here)) . If we couldn’t access fresh foods in our neighborhood, then we would grow our own. We just needed a space to grow them and money to buy supplies.
I began by finding a spot to plant our garden. My friends and I walked around the entire school and decided that the courtyard would be the perfect place. After explaining my idea to the Assistant Principal, I got permission to proceed.
Next(( This paragraph is full of good action steps)) I raised money for the supplies. With $20 in seed money from my parents, which I promptly paid back, I drew and printed stickers to sell at lunch. The stickers were anthropomorphized vegetables. They cost $0.10 per sticker to make, and I sold them for $1.00 each. Soon enough, I had not only raised enough money to set up the garden, but I had rallied the whole school around my cause. Thirty of my classmates showed up, vegetable stickers on their water bottles, to help me plant the garden.
For the last year, we’ve maintained a spread of seasonal vegetables in the garden. We bring a basket to the cooking elective teacher each week so students can practice cooking with fresh vegetables, and we hold a daily farm stand at lunch(( And we see that they are legitimately improving their community)) . At the stand, students can grab whatever fresh produce they want to add to their lunch.
My school’s garden nourishes my community, and I am nourished every day by the fact that my efforts have made a true difference to those around me.
Word Count: 341
Yes. The writer shows really great initiative and community understanding in their willingness to start a community garden from scratch.
Yes. With only one question, this prompt is pretty straightforward. And the writer’s answer is simple: to make their school community a better place, they made a community garden.
Yes. The writer goes into detail about every step they took to make the community garden come to life. I especially like how the writer goes beyond these details to emphasize how much the community garden impacted the school community.
UC Prompt 8: Additional Information
8. Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California?
Prompt 8 Example Essay
When I posted a TikTok video of myself studying, I didn’t expect anyone but my friends to see it. But within hours, my video had gone viral— tens of thousands of people(( That’s a lot of people. This shows the magnitude and impact of the video.)) saw the carefully-crafted shots I’d taken of my desk setup and homework timelapse. The comment section flooded. People appreciated the work I’d put into curating the perfect desk. They thanked me for inspiring them to get started on their own homework. I was overwhelmed by the response.
At first I felt really shy. What if people from school saw it and made fun of me? I kept questioning myself so much that I completely froze. Finally, one comment caught my attention. It read, “I’ve been having a hard semester and can barely get myself out of bed, let alone to do my homework. But this is so calming! Maybe I’ll try.” That comment made me realize that it didn’t matter what people at my school thought. What mattered was that I loved making that video and it had made an actual difference in the lives of the people who saw it.
And that’s when I decided to make my mark on #StudyTok(( This is a pretty unique topic that wouldn’t have necessarily fit into the other prompt categories, which makes it a good candidate for prompt #8.)) . Since that first video, I’ve posted 318 others and accumulated over 35,000 followers(( More numbers to show impact)) . I’ve had more videos go viral and reach hundreds of thousands of people looking for work inspiration. Even the videos that some would see as “fails” still reach a couple hundred people. That may not be a big deal in the Internet world, but those same people would fill up my high school’s auditorium. My goal for every video is to make my viewers feel relaxed and able to take on whatever work they have to do. It helps me and my viewers complete our work.
These videos have made me more confident and organized, and I can’t wait to continue them in college. When I get an extra assignment or have to stay up late to finish a paper, I become excited instead of frustrated because I know that the little StudyTok community I’ve created will be there right alongside me.(( This conclusion drives home the what “makes you a strong candidate for admissions to the UC” part of the prompt.))
Yes. They show creativity through their video production and leadership through their huge community impact.
Mostly. This prompt is a tricky one to answer because its components aren’t as straightforward as the others. Through such a huge impact, the writer makes it implicitly clear why this story demonstrates that they are a good candidate for admissions to the UC, but the message could be more explicit.
Yes. The writer conveys the sequence of events in a clear and organized way, and they use good metrics to show the impact of their videos.
Key Takeaways
Did you catch our golden rules throughout? Yep. That’s what makes these essays stand out, and that’s what’ll make your essays stand out, too.
And even though these essays come from different students, hopefully you also got a sense of how an admissions officer reads a portfolio of essays for a single student.
Remember: just like your other applications, your overall goal for your UC application is to create a cohesive application narrative that shows your core strengths.
Having read all these essays, you’re now well on your way to writing your own. Try jumping into the Essay Academy or our UC essay writing guide for help getting started.
Liked that? Try this next.
21 College Essay Examples (Graded by Former Admissions Officers)
How A Selective Admissions Office Reads 50k Applications In A Season
How to Write Supplemental Essays that Will Impress Admissions Officers
"the only actually useful chance calculator i’ve seen—plus a crash course on the application review process.".
Irena Smith, Former Stanford Admissions Officer
We built the best admissions chancer in the world . How is it the best? It draws from our experience in top-10 admissions offices to show you how selective admissions actually works.
- [email protected]
- (650) 338-8226
Cupertino, CA
- Our Philosophy
- Our Results
- News, Media, and Press
- Common Application
- College Application Essay Editing
- Extracurricular Planning
- Academic Guidance
- Summer Programs
- Interview Preparation
Middle School
- Pre-High School Consultation
- Boarding School Admissions
College Admissions
- Academic and Extracurricular Profile Evaluation
- Senior Editor College Application Program
- Summer Program Applications
- Private Consulting Program
- Transfer Admissions
- UC Transfer Admissions
- Ivy League Transfer Admissions
Graduate Admissions
- Graduate School Admissions
- MBA Admissions
Private Tutoring
- SAT/ACT Tutoring
- AP Exam Tutoring
- Olympiad Training
Academic Programs
- Passion Project Program
- Science Research Program
- Humanities Competitions
- Ad Hoc Consulting
- Athletic Recruitment
- National Universities Rankings
- Liberal Arts Colleges Rankings
- Public Schools Rankings
Acceptance Rates
- University Acceptance Rates
- Transfer Acceptance Rates
- Supplemental Essays
- College Admissions Data
- Chances Calculator
- GPA Calculator
National Universities
- College Acceptance Rates
- College Overall Acceptance Rates
- College Regular Acceptance Rates
- College Early Acceptance Rates
- Ivy League Acceptance Rates
- Ivy League Overall Acceptance Rates
- Ivy League Regular Acceptance Rates
- Ivy League Early Acceptance Rates
Public Schools
- Public Schools Acceptance Rates
- Public Schools Overall Acceptance Rates
- Public Schools Regular Acceptance Rates
- Public Schools Early Acceptance Rates
Liberal Arts
- Liberal Arts Colleges Acceptance Rates
- Liberal Arts Colleges Overall Acceptance Rates
- Liberal Arts Colleges Regular Acceptance Rates
- Liberal Arts Colleges Early Acceptance Rates
UC Berkeley Essay Prompts 2023-2024
By Eric Eng
Welcome to the guide on the UC Berkeley Essays for the 2023-2024 application season. If you’re applying to UC Berkeley, you already know it’s one of the top universities in the world. But getting in isn’t just about having great grades or test scores; your essays are just as important.
These short pieces of writing are your chance to show who you are beyond numbers and lists of activities. They allow you to share your thoughts, experiences, and ambitions with the admissions committee. In this guide, we’ll explore the prompts for this year and provide you with tips and strategies to craft essays that will catch the attention of the admissions officers and make a lasting impression.
Let’s get started on this journey to putting your best foot forward with UC Berkeley’s essays for the application cycle 2023-2024.
How Important are Supplemental Essays in the College Admissions Process?
Essays, particularly those for prestigious institutions like UC Berkeley , play a crucial role in the college admissions process. Here are three key points that highlight their importance:
1. Personalization and Individuality: UC Berkeley essays offer a unique opportunity for students to showcase their individuality, beyond just grades and test scores. This is a platform where they can express their personal narratives, life experiences, and specific interests that align with the school’s values and programs. A well-crafted essay can distinguish a student from the pool of applicants by providing a glimpse into their personality, creativity, and potential contributions to the campus community.
2. Demonstration of Fit: Essays specific to UC Berkeley for the years 2023-2024 allow students to tailor their responses to demonstrate how they are an ideal fit for the university. This involves not just speaking about what the school can offer them, but also what they can bring to the school.
A strong essay can connect a student’s aspirations, experiences, and values with UC Berkeley’s academic offerings, cultural ethos, and mission. This alignment showcases the student as not just academically capable but also as someone who will thrive and contribute positively to the campus environment.
3. Critical Thinking and Communication Skills: The ability to articulate thoughts effectively and persuasively is a key skill sought by top universities like UC Berkeley. The essay-writing process evaluates a student’s critical thinking, clarity in communication, and writing skills. An impressive essay demonstrates a student’s ability to present complex ideas coherently, argue a point of view, and engage the reader. These skills are indicative of a student’s readiness for college-level work and their potential for academic success.
Overall, essays are not just a formality in the college admissions process, especially for institutions like UC Berkeley. They provide a comprehensive picture of the applicant, highlighting their personality, fit for the university, and intellectual capabilities. A compelling essay can be a decisive factor in gaining UC Berkeley admission, making it an essential component of the application process for the years 2023-2024.
How Many Essay Prompts Does UC Berkeley Have?
For the 2023-2024 academic year, the University of California schools, including renowned institutions like UC Berkeley, UCLA , and UC San Diego, along with seven other campuses, have released their essay prompts for prospective students enrolling in 2024. Unlike many other major universities that utilize the Common Application, the UC system operates with its unique application process.
Students aspiring to join any of these UC campuses, including those crafting their UC Berkeley Essays 2023-2024, are required to write four essays . They have the liberty to choose these from a set of eight options . So, what exactly are the essay prompts for UC Berkeley in the 2023-2024 application cycle? Let’s delve into them!
What are the UC Essay Prompts?
If you’re applying to UC Berkeley or any University of California school, you’ll have to write answers to four personal insight questions . Each one should be 350 words long, and you can pick which ones you want to answer from a list of eight options.
1. Describe an example of a leadership experience in which you’ve positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.
2. Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
3. What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
4. Describe how you’ve taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you’ve faced.
5. Describe the most significant challenge you’ve faced and the steps you’ve taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
6. Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you’ve furthered this interest inside and/or outside the classroom.
7. What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
8. Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you a strong candidate for admission to the University of California?
How to Write the UC Berkeley Essays
Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.
Being a leader isn’t just about having a title. It’s about guiding others, taking charge of a job, or leading a team on a project or event. Consider what you did and what you got out of it. What was your role?
Did you guide a group? How did leading others change how you see leadership? Did you solve a big problem at your school, place of worship, neighborhood, or a group you’re part of? Remember, being a leader isn’t just for school stuff. For instance, do you look after your family?
How to Respond:
Identify a Specific Leadership Experience: The first step is to recall a particular instance where the student demonstrated leadership. This could be in a formal setting like being a club president, a team captain, or an organizer of an event, or in an informal situation like leading a group project, resolving a conflict among peers, or volunteering in the community. The key is to choose an experience that had a significant impact on the student or those involved. The student should think about a situation that challenged them and where they had to use their initiative and leadership skills to make a difference.
1. Detail the Positive Influence and Conflict Resolution: Once the experience is chosen, the student should focus on how they positively influenced others. This involves explaining the actions they took to encourage, motivate, or guide others and the outcome of these actions. If the experience involved resolving disputes, the student should discuss how they approached the conflict, listened to different viewpoints, and found a solution that was acceptable to all parties involved. It’s important to highlight empathy, understanding, and the ability to bring people together.
2. Reflect on Personal Growth and Learning: A crucial part of this essay is reflecting on what the student learned from this experience. This could include understanding more about their own leadership style, gaining insights into team dynamics, or learning how to deal with challenging situations. It’s about showing self-awareness and the ability to learn and grow from experiences. The student should explain how this leadership experience has shaped them and possibly influenced their future goals or aspirations.
3. Demonstrate Long-term Contribution: Finally, the student should illustrate how their leadership contributed to group efforts over time. This isn’t just about a one-time event; it’s about showing sustained effort and ongoing impact. The student could discuss how their leadership led to lasting changes in a club, improved team performance over a season, or contributed to ongoing success in a group project. This part of the essay should convey a sense of commitment and the ability to make a lasting difference.
Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem-solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
What does being creative mean to you? Is there a creative talent you really care about? What have you managed to do with it? If you’ve ever used your imagination to tackle a problem, what was your solution? How did you come up with it?
Consider how your creativity plays a role in your choices, whether you’re in school or outside of it. Does it connect to what you want to study or the job you want in the future? You might believe this question is just for people who are good at art, but if you look again, you’ll see it’s asking for your own idea of creativity.
1. Identify Your Unique Expression of Creativity: The first step is for the student to reflect on how they uniquely express their creativity. This could be through traditional artistic methods like painting or writing, or through less conventional means such as devising unique solutions to everyday problems, engaging in creative coding, or innovative project designs. Students should think about moments where they felt most creative and what they were doing at that time. It’s important to choose a form of creative expression that is genuinely meaningful to them, as this will shine through in their writing.
2. Illustrate with Specific Examples: Once the student has identified how they express their creativity, the next step is to illustrate this with specific examples. This could be a project they spearheaded, a personal challenge they overcame using a unique approach, or a hobby that requires creative thinking. Detailed storytelling is key here; rather than just stating they are creative, they should show how their creativity manifests through their actions and decisions.
3. Reflect on the Impact: After detailing specific examples, students should reflect on the impact of their creative endeavors. This could be on a personal level, such as how engaging in creative activities has shaped their identity or thinking patterns, or on a broader scale, like the impact of their creativity on others or their community. This reflection shows depth of thought and self-awareness, which are qualities universities like UC Berkeley value.
4. Connect to Future Goals and Ambitions: Lastly, it would be beneficial for students to tie their creative side to their future goals and aspirations, particularly how they plan to continue expressing and cultivating this creativity in college and beyond. This could involve discussing how they see their creativity playing a role in their intended major, future career, or how they plan to contribute to the UC Berkeley community. This not only shows that they have direction but also how their unique qualities will add value to the university.
What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
If you have a special skill or something you’re really good at, now’s the time to talk about it. It’s okay if you haven’t won any awards for it. You can still tell us why it’s important to you. Did this ability come easily to you, or did you have to work hard at it? Can you use this skill in school or somewhere else? If you can, tell us how you managed to fit it into your life.
1. Identifying the Talent or Skill: The first step is for students to introspect and identify a talent or skill that truly resonates with their personality and experiences. It’s important that they choose something that is genuinely significant to them, rather than what they think might impress the admissions committee.
This could be anything from a creative skill like painting or writing, to interpersonal skills like empathy or leadership, or even a unique ability to solve complex problems. The key here is authenticity and showing a deep connection with the talent or skill chosen.
2. Narrative of Development: Once the talent or skill is identified, students should reflect on how it has developed over time. This isn’t just about showcasing when and how they discovered this talent, but also about illustrating their commitment to nurturing and improving it.
They could discuss milestones, challenges, or pivotal moments that contributed to the growth of their skill. This narrative helps to demonstrate perseverance, dedication, and a willingness to learn and grow, qualities that are highly valued in a university environment.
3. Evidence of Demonstration: It’s essential for students to provide concrete examples of how they have demonstrated this talent or skill. This could include personal projects, participation in clubs or organizations, competitions, volunteer work, or any other relevant experiences. By providing specific examples, students can illustrate the practical application of their talent and its impact. This also offers a window into their personality and how they engage with the world around them.
4. Reflecting on Impact: Finally, students should reflect on the impact their talent or skill has had on their personal growth and on others. This could involve discussing how it has shaped their perspective, contributed to their academic or career goals, or allowed them to make a difference in their community.
This reflection shows depth of thought, self-awareness, and an understanding of the broader implications of their personal abilities. It’s an opportunity to connect their individual experiences and skills to the larger world, demonstrating maturity and forward-thinking.
By thoughtfully addressing these aspects, students can create a compelling and introspective response that not only highlights their unique abilities but also offers a glimpse into their personal journey and character development.
Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
When thinking about what to write, remember that an educational opportunity could be anything that has made your learning better and helped get you ready for college. This could be being part of a special program for advanced or honors students, joining a school focused on a certain job or subject you want to study, or just taking challenging classes you like.
1. Identifying the Opportunity or Barrier: Students should begin by clearly identifying a significant educational opportunity they embraced or an educational barrier they faced. This could range from taking part in advanced courses, engaging in special academic programs, or tackling personal circumstances that impacted their education, such as language barriers or socio-economic challenges. It’s crucial to describe the situation in a way that sets the stage for the ensuing narrative. The focus should be on providing context to understand the significance of the opportunity or challenge.
2. Personal Growth and Learning: After setting the scene, the next step is to delve into how engaging with this opportunity or overcoming the barrier contributed to their personal and academic growth. Students should reflect on what they learned from the experience and how it shaped their perspective on education and personal development. This part of the essay should illustrate a journey of transformation, showcasing how the student evolved, what skills they developed, and how their approach to learning or problem-solving improved.
3. Actions and Initiative: An essential aspect of this prompt is demonstrating initiative and action. Whether it’s about how they took advantage of an opportunity or overcame a barrier, students need to highlight the specific steps they took. This might involve describing the effort put into an academic project, seeking out mentors or resources, or balancing challenging circumstances with their commitment to education. This section should convey a sense of agency and determination, painting a picture of a student who is actively engaged in shaping their educational journey.
4. Linking Experiences to Future Goals: Lastly, students should connect their experiences to their future aspirations and how it aligns with their desire to study at UC Berkeley. This part is about drawing a line from past experiences to future ambitions, demonstrating that the lessons learned and the skills acquired are stepping stones towards their long-term goals. It’s an opportunity to show how their unique experiences have prepared them for the challenges and opportunities that lie ahead in college and beyond.
Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
You might face a challenge in your life, with your friends, at school, or in your neighborhood. Think about why this challenge matters to you. This is your chance to share the tough situations you’ve come across and what you’ve learned from them. Did someone help you, or did you manage it by yourself?
If you’re still dealing with a tough situation, what steps are you taking to handle it? How has this situation changed things for you at home, school, or with your friends and family?
We at Admissionsight suggest that if you don’t come from a background with many challenges, you might want to skip this essay question. That’s because there will be students who have had to deal with really big problems, like losing their homes, and it might not look good if you write about a smaller issue like your school not offering more math classes.
1. The Significant Challenge: The first step is to select a challenge that has had a profound impact on the student’s life. This could be a personal, academic, or social challenge. It’s important to choose a challenge that genuinely affected them, as authenticity in the essay will resonate more with the admissions committee. The chosen challenge should be substantial enough to allow for a detailed discussion about its impact and the student’s response. For example, overcoming a learning disability, dealing with a family crisis, or facing cultural barriers could be potential topics.
2. Describing Steps Taken to Overcome the Challenge: After identifying the challenge, the student should clearly outline the specific actions they took to address it. This is where they can demonstrate problem-solving skills, resilience, and determination. It’s essential to focus on the process rather than just the outcome, as the journey towards overcoming the challenge is often more insightful than the resolution itself. This might include seeking help, learning new skills, or changing their perspective on the problem.
3. Reflecting on Personal Growth: This section of the essay should delve into how the challenge has contributed to the student’s personal development. It’s an opportunity to showcase character strengths such as perseverance, adaptability, and emotional intelligence. The student should reflect on what they learned about themselves through this experience and how it has prepared them for future challenges. This introspection can reveal maturity and depth of character, qualities that are highly valued in college applicants.
4. Linking the Challenge to Academic Achievement: Finally, the student needs to connect their experience with the challenge to their academic life. This could mean discussing how overcoming the challenge has improved their academic performance, influenced their academic interests, or shaped their educational goals. For instance, a student who overcame a speech impediment might discuss how this experience led to a passion for linguistics, or a student who dealt with a health issue might explain how it sparked an interest in biomedical engineering.
Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
If there’s a school subject you love and can’t seem to get enough of, how have you learned more about it? Talk about how you started to like this subject and share any related things you’ve done, like helping out in your community, working a job, joining in on summer activities, or being part of school clubs. What did these activities teach you?
Has your favorite subject influenced your choice of what to study in college or the job you want in the future? Have you taken any advanced or college-level classes in this area? Do you want to keep studying this subject at the University of California, and if so, how?
If you often call yourself a “nerd” or “geek” because of your love for a certain subject, this is your chance to talk about it. You can explain how your favorite subject has led to a hobby outside of school, or you can think about how a hobby of yours started from something you learned in class.
1. Identifying the Subject and Initial Fascination: Students should begin by clearly identifying the academic subject that captivates them. This should be more than just stating the subject; it’s crucial to articulate why this subject sparks their interest. They could reflect on a moment or experience that ignited their passion for the subject. For instance, a student fascinated by physics might recall their awe when they first learned about the laws of motion and how it prompted them to explore further. This part of the essay should aim to convey the student’s initial curiosity and enthusiasm.
2. Examples of Classroom Engagement: Next, the student should describe how they have pursued this interest within their school environment. This might include taking advanced or specialized courses, participating in related clubs, or engaging in class projects or discussions that delve deeper into the subject. The key here is to demonstrate active engagement and a desire to explore the subject beyond the basic curriculum. For example, a student interested in literature might talk about how they led a book club discussion in their English class or chose challenging literary works for independent study.
3. Exploration Beyond the Classroom: It’s equally important to discuss how the student has extended their learning outside of school. This could involve personal projects, extracurricular activities, internships, volunteering, or any other experiences that show a commitment to exploring the subject in a real-world context. For example, a student passionate about environmental science might volunteer for local conservation efforts or initiate a recycling program in their community. This part of the essay should illustrate how the student’s interest is not confined to academic settings but is a part of their everyday life and personal growth.
4. Reflection and Future Aspirations: Finally, students should reflect on what they have learned from their experiences and how this will shape their future goals and pursuits, especially in relation to their potential studies and contributions at UC Berkeley. This is an opportunity to link their past experiences and future aspirations, showing a clear trajectory of passion and purpose. For instance, a student interested in engineering might discuss how their hands-on experiences and academic pursuits have prepared them to contribute to UC Berkeley’s engineering community and beyond.
What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
When you hear “community,” you might think of your sports team, your neighborhood, or where you go to school. You decide what “community” means to you, and tell us how you’ve been involved. Did you see something that needed to be changed?
What made you want to do something about it? What lessons did you take away from trying? How did your actions help other people or your community as a whole? Did you work by yourself or with others to make a difference where you live?
1. Identify Specific Contributions: Encourage students to reflect on their tangible contributions to their school or community. This could include organizing events, participating in or leading community service projects, starting a club or initiative, or even small-scale actions like tutoring peers or improving school facilities. The key is to focus on specific activities where their involvement made a measurable difference.
2. Emphasize Personal Growth and Learning: A crucial aspect of this prompt is not just what the student did, but also what they learned from the experience. Did they gain new skills, like leadership or communication? Did they overcome challenges or change their perspective on a societal issue? This reflection shows maturity and self-awareness, important qualities for a university student.
3. Highlight Collaboration and Impact on Others: UC Berkeley values community and teamwork. Students should discuss how they worked with others, showing their ability to collaborate and build relationships. They should also reflect on the impact of their actions on those around them. Did their efforts lead to a stronger, more connected community? How did others benefit from their actions?
4. Connect to Future Goals and Aspirations: Finally, students should tie their past actions to their future ambitions. How do these experiences shape their goals, especially as they relate to their intended field of study or future career? This connection demonstrates forward-thinking and a commitment to continuing positive contributions, aligning with UC Berkeley’s ethos of innovation and social responsibility.
Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admission to the University of California?
If there’s something about you that you think is important for the UC admissions team to know, but you haven’t had a chance to share it yet, this is the time to do so. What makes you different? Maybe you have a unique skill, a special talent, or you’ve faced a challenge that shows who you are. Think about what makes you a great pick for the University of California. It’s okay to show off here.
This part of the application is wide open—you get to take control of the story you tell. Is there a part of your life or experience that you’re eager to share with the UC admissions team that makes you stand out, but it doesn’t fit into the other questions you’ve answered? Remember to give lots of details and explain why this story is so important to you. Also, make sure you talk about why this makes you a particularly good fit for the UC system.
1. Identify Unique Personal Qualities or Experiences: Encourage students to reflect on aspects of their identity or experiences that are unique to them. This could include overcoming specific challenges, engaging in unusual hobbies or interests, or having a distinctive cultural background. For example, if a student grew up in a multicultural environment, they could discuss how this experience has shaped their worldview and ability to interact with diverse communities, a quality that’s highly valued at a global institution like UC Berkeley.
2. Highlight Unmentioned Achievements or Projects: Students should think about any accomplishments or projects they haven’t already mentioned in their application. This could be a personal project, a community initiative, or an achievement in an area not traditionally associated with academic success. For instance, if a student has developed an app to solve a community problem or has been actively involved in environmental activism, these are achievements worth mentioning.
3. Demonstrate Alignment with UC Berkeley’s Values: It’s important for students to research and understand UC Berkeley’s values and mission. They can then reflect on how their personal qualities or experiences align with these values. If UC Berkeley emphasizes innovation, a student could talk about how their creative thinking or problem-solving skills have been evident in their past endeavors, and how they plan to bring that innovative spirit to campus.
4. Showcase Growth and Learning: This prompt is a great opportunity for students to discuss how they have grown or what they have learned from their experiences. This could involve personal development, such as learning to overcome failures, or intellectual growth, such as developing a passion for a particular field of study. For instance, a student might describe how working a part-time job taught them valuable lessons about responsibility, time management, and empathy.
How to Structure Your Application Essays
A well-structured essay not only conveys the message clearly but also reflects the applicant’s organizational and analytical skills. Here are three key points elaborating how an applicant can effectively structure their UC Berkeley essays for the academic years 2023-2024:
1. Introduction with a Hook and Statement: The introduction is crucial in capturing the reader’s attention. Applicants should start their 2023-2024 UC Berkeley essays with a compelling hook – a unique anecdote, a thought-provoking question, or an intriguing statement about their experiences or perspectives.
Following the hook, the introduction should include a clear statement that outlines the main theme or argument of the essay. This approach not only grabs the attention of the admissions committee but also sets a clear direction for the rest of the essay.
2. Body Paragraphs with Clear Arguments and Examples: Each body paragraph should focus on a single idea or experience that supports the statement. Applicants should use a mix of personal anecdotes, reflections, and specific examples to illustrate their points.
This section should demonstrate how their experiences, achievements, and goals align with what UC Berkeley offers. The use of detailed examples not only provides depth to their narrative but also showcases their understanding of the university’s ethos and programs. Transition sentences at the end of each paragraph can help maintain the flow and coherence of the essay.
3. Concluding Statement: The conclusion is an opportunity to reinforce how the applicant’s experiences and aspirations make them a perfect fit for UC Berkeley. Additionally, the conclusion can be forward-looking, tying the applicant’s goals and potential contributions to what they hope to achieve at UC Berkeley. This not only brings the essay full circle but also leaves a lasting impression on the admissions committee.
Incorporating these structural elements in UC Berkeley essays for 2023-2024 will help applicants present their stories in a coherent, compelling, and organized manner. This structure not only aids in conveying the content effectively but also demonstrates the applicant’s writing skills, critical thinking, and suitability for the academic environment at UC Berkeley.
How Do the UC Berkeley Essays Compare to Other Top Universities?
The UC Berkeley essays, especially for the academic years 2023-2024, have distinctive features that set them apart from essays required by other top universities. This comparison sheds light on the unique expectations and focuses of different prestigious institutions.
Firstly, UC Berkeley essays tend to emphasize diversity, social responsibility, and innovation. The university is known for its progressive ethos and commitment to social change, which is reflected in its essay prompts. For instance, prompts may ask students to discuss how they have contributed to or plan to contribute to social justice, diversity, or environmental sustainability.
This contrasts with schools like Harvard or Yale , where essay prompts are often more open-ended and focused on personal growth, intellectual curiosity, and academic interests. UC Berkeley’s prompts guide applicants to demonstrate their alignment with the university’s values and mission, encouraging them to showcase how they can contribute to and benefit from Berkeley’s unique environment.
Secondly, the structure and style of UC Berkeley essays often require a balance between personal narrative and intellectual exploration. Unlike Stanford’s essays, which are known for creative and unconventional prompts that allow for a wide range of expressive freedom, UC Berkeley’s prompts usually call for a more structured response.
They often require applicants to provide specific examples of experiences or goals related to the prompt’s theme. This structure necessitates a clear demonstration of the applicant’s thought process, decision-making skills, and the ability to articulate their experiences in a way that highlights their potential contribution to the Berkeley community.
Lastly, the tone and content of UC Berkeley essays often reflect the university’s emphasis on real-world impact and pragmatic solutions. Unlike MIT or Caltech, where essay prompts might lean more towards technical prowess and scientific inquiry, UC Berkeley’s prompts encourage applicants to discuss the practical implications of their interests and experiences.
This includes addressing societal issues, reflecting on personal challenges in a broader context, or discussing how one’s academic interests can lead to tangible changes in the community. This focus on practical application aligns with UC Berkeley’s reputation as an institution that values not just academic excellence but also social engagement and impact.
How to Effectively Revise and Proofread
Effectively revising and proofreading essays, especially for prestigious universities like UC Berkeley, is a critical step in the application process. Here are four detailed key points on how applicants can enhance their UC Berkeley Essays for the years 2023-2024:
1. Structure and Coherence Check: Start by evaluating the overall structure of the essay. Ensure that each paragraph flows logically to the next, and there’s a coherent narrative throughout. Check if the introduction effectively sets the stage and if the conclusion ties back to the main points without introducing new information. For the 2023-2024 UC Berkeley essays, it’s essential to make sure that the structure aligns with the prompt’s requirements and effectively showcases the applicant’s strengths, experiences, and fit for the university.
2. Content Depth and Relevance Analysis: Dive deep into the content of each section. Assess whether each paragraph contributes meaningfully to the essay’s overall message. Remove or revise parts that seem off-topic or do not add value to your narrative. Especially for UC Berkeley, ensure that the content reflects the applicant’s understanding of the university’s values, such as diversity, innovation, and social responsibility. Check if personal anecdotes and examples are relevant and effectively illustrate the points being made.
3. Language and Clarity Enhancement: Pay close attention to the choice of words, sentence construction, and overall readability. Use active voice wherever possible, and vary sentence structure to maintain reader interest. Avoid jargon and overly complex language that might obscure the message.
For the 2023-2024 UC Berkeley essays, it’s important to maintain a balance between a formal tone and personal voice. Ensure that the essay sounds authentic and conveys the applicant’s personality, while still being polished and professional.
4. Final Proofreading for Grammar and Typos: The final step involves a meticulous proofreading session. Look for grammatical errors, spelling mistakes, and typos. These small errors can detract from the professionalism of the essay.
Reading the essay aloud or having someone else review it can be helpful in catching mistakes that might have been overlooked. For UC Berkeley applicants, presenting a well-proofread essay is crucial, as it reflects attention to detail and dedication to presenting one’s best self.
By following these steps, applicants can significantly improve their UC Berkeley Essays for 2023-2024. The process of revision and proofreading is not just about correcting errors; it’s about refining and enhancing the essay to best represent the applicant’s abilities, aspirations, and fit for the university.
Why Choose UC Berkeley?
Choosing UC Berkeley means picking a place that stands out for its commitment to excellence and innovation. It’s not just any university—it’s a hub where bright minds meet to challenge the status quo and push the boundaries of knowledge.
At Berkeley, you’ll find yourself among a diverse group of students and faculty who are pioneers in their fields. The campus is famous for its dynamic atmosphere, where every idea and perspective is valued, setting the stage for groundbreaking research and learning experiences.
What’s more, UC Berkeley is known for its impressive alumni network, full of leaders who have made significant impacts in various industries around the world. Opting for Berkeley could connect you with opportunities that are hard to find elsewhere. Its location in the San Francisco Bay Area, a thriving center for technology and culture, gives you the chance to engage with numerous industries and communities.
At its heart, UC Berkeley is not just an institution but a community that fosters growth, ambition, and a commitment to making a difference. Choosing UC Berkeley is about embracing a future filled with possibilities and being part of a long-standing tradition of excellence. It’s where you don’t just attend classes; you join a lively and supportive community that propels you toward your dreams.
Final Thoughts
As we wrap up our guide to the 2023- 2024 UC Berkeley essays, remember that this is more than just a writing task—it’s your chance to have a heart-to-heart with t he admissions committee. Your essays are your voice in the room full of potential Golden Bears. They should reflect who you are, not just what you’ve done.
So, take a deep breath, trust in your unique experiences, and let your personality shine through your words. Keep it real, keep it you, and don’t be afraid to let your passion for learning and growing at UC Berkeley light the way. It’s your story, your future, and now is the time to share it. Good luck, and Go Bears!
AdmissionSight , a college consulting firm, offers personalized assistance to students in their college admissions journey. We help you create a strategic plan for your application process, identify suitable schools aligned with your academic and personal goals, and prioritize your application strategy.
Our experts review your application, providing constructive feedback to enhance its quality and uniqueness. We also assist in crafting compelling essays that reflect your personality and achievements, guide you through the writing process, and offer feedback on drafts. In addition, we provide interview coaching to boost your confidence and readiness for college interviews, offering tips on professional presentation and answering common questions.
We aid in optimizing your extracurricular activities to align with your interests and goals, emphasizing leadership and initiative. Overall, AdmissionSight offers valuable guidance and support to increase your chances of college acceptance. With a strong network and a success rate exceeding 75% in the past decade, book a free initial consultation today!
Want to assess your chances of admission? Take our FREE chances calculator today!
Why College Admissions Isn’t Perfect
US News Rankings
The Personal Statement: The Holy Grail of College Admissions
The Modern Day 4.0 and 1600 SAT Score Student Is No Longer Impressive
The Competitive Nature of College Admissions for Asian Americans
The College Application
Our Comprehensive Approach
Ivy League Schools
How Early Should You Prepare for College?
Featured in US News & World Report Best Colleges Publication
Congratulations to AdmissionSight Students and their Acceptances!
College Rejection
College Rankings
College Consultants Could Make A Difference
College Admissions Scandal and Higher Education
Columbia Legacy Acceptance Rate
The Duke Common Data Set
What Is The Easiest Engineering Degree?
How to get into dartmouth: admission requirements and tips.
27 Scholarships for Black Women
6 Reasons Why the University of Chicago (UChicago) Is a Good School
Internship interview questions: Insights + Tips
Law Schools That Don’t Require the LSAT
Is It Too Late to Apply for College: A Complete Guide
Is This Really the “Worst” Ivy League School?
Can You Take AP Classes over the Summer?
How Hard Is It To Become A Lawyer?
A Complete Guide to Cornell University Campus Life
7 Reasons Why College Should Be Free
How to Tackle Hard Math Problems: Tips + Examples
Can I Apply For Private Student Loan Forgiveness? Full Guide + Tips
USC Supplemental Essays 2024-2025: Prompts + Tips
Leave a comment cancel reply.
Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *
Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment.
Recent Articles
What Is The Easiest Engineering...
How to get into dartmouth:....
6 Reasons Why the University...
Internship interview questions: Insights +...
Law Schools That Don’t Require...
Is It Too Late to...
Is This Really the “Worst”...
Can You Take AP Classes...
How Hard Is It To...
Sign up now to receive insights on how to navigate the college admissions process..
Admissions Counseling
- Academic & Extracurricular Profile Evaluation
Copyright © AdmissionSight 2024
Privacy Policy - Terms and Conditions
2023 Ultimate Guide: 20 UC Essay Examples
by Winning Ivy Prep Team | Mar 8, 2023 | UC Admissions , UC Personal Insight Essay Examples
Additional UC essay resources:
- Official UC Personal Insight Question prompts are here.
- Read our UC Essay / UC Personal Insight Essay Tips
Table of Contents
UC Personal Insight #1 Examples
Your chancing factors
Extracurriculars.
How to Write the University of California Essays 2024-2025
The University of California (UC) school system is the most prestigious state university system in the United States and includes nine undergraduate universities: UC Berkeley, UC San Diego, UCLA, UC Santa Barbara, UC Santa Cruz, UC Davis, UC Riverside, UC Merced, and UC Irvine.
The University of California system has its own application portal, as well as its own deadline of November 30th—a full month before the Common Application is due. All nine universities use one application, so it is easy to apply to multiple UCs at the same time.
The application requires you to answer four of eight personal insight questions, with a 350-word limit on each prompt. This may seem daunting at first, but we provide this guide to make the prompts more approachable and to help you effectively tackle them!
University of California Application Essay Prompts
Note: There is only one application for all the UC schools, so your responses will be sent to every University of California school that you apply to. You should avoid making essays school-specific (unless you are applying to only one school).
You might want to start by deciding which four of the eight prompts you plan on answering. The eight prompts are:
1. Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes, or contributed to group efforts over time.
2. every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem-solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. describe how you express your creative side., 3. what would you say is your greatest talent or skill how have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time, 4. describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced., 5. describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. how has this challenge affected your academic achievement, 6. think about an academic subject that inspires you. describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom., 7. what have you done to make your school or your community a better place, 8. beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the university of california.
As you begin selecting prompts, keep the purpose of college essays at the forefront of your mind. College essays are the place to humanize yourself and transform your test scores, GPA, and extracurriculars into a living, breathing human with values, ambitions, and a backstory. If a specific prompt will allow you to show a part of who you are that is not showcased in the rest of your application, start there.
If nothing immediately jumps out at you, try dividing the prompts into three categories: “definites,” “possibilities,” and “avoids at all costs.” “Definites” will be prompts that quickly spark up a specific idea in you. “Possibilities” might elicit a few loose concepts, anecdotes, or structures. And “avoids” are prompts where you honestly cannot see yourself writing a convincing essay. Next, take your “definites” and “possibilities” and jot down your initial thoughts about them. Finally, look at all of your ideas together and decide which combination would produce the most well-rounded essay profile that shows who you are as an individual.
Of course, this is just one way to approach choosing prompts if you are stuck. Some students might prefer writing out a list of their values, identifying the most important ones in their life, then figuring out how to showcase those through the prompts. Other students select prompts based on what they are excited by or through freewriting on every prompt first. Do not feel constrained by any one method. Just remember:
- Do not rush into prompts at first glance (though trial writing can be very valuable!).
- Make sure that you consider potential ideas for many prompts before making final decisions, and ultimately write about the one with the most substance.
- The prompts you select should allow you to highlight what is most important to you.
Check out our video to learn more about how to write the UC essays!
The 8 UC Personal Insight Questions
“Leadership Experience” is often a subheading on student resumes, but that is not what admissions officers are asking about here. They are asking for you to tell them a specific story of a time when your leadership truly mattered. This could include discussing the policies you enacted as president of a school club or the social ties you helped establish as captain of a sports team, but this prompt also gives you the freedom to go past that.
Leaders are individuals with strong values, who mentor, inspire, correct, and assist those around them. If you don’t feel like you’ve ever been a leader, consider the following questions:
- Have you ever mentored anyone? Is there anyone younger than you who would not be the person they are today without you?
- Have you ever taken the initiative? When and why did it matter?
- Have you ever been fundamental to positive change in the world—whether it be on the small scale of positively impacting a family member’s life or on the large scale of trying to change the status of specific communities/identities in this world?
- Have you ever stood up for what’s right or what you believe in?
Leadership is a concept that can be stretched, bent, and played with, but at the end of the day, the central theme of your essay must be leadership. Keeping this in mind, after your first draft, it can be helpful to identify the definition of leadership that you are working with, to keep your essay cohesive. This definition doesn’t need to appear within the essay (though, if you take on a more reflective structure, it might). Some examples of this include “being a positive role model as leadership,” “encouraging others to take risks as leadership,” and “embracing my identities as leadership.”
Here are some examples of how a leadership essay might look:
- You’ve always loved learning and challenging yourself, but when you got to high school it was clear that only a certain type of student was recommended to take AP classes and you didn’t fit into that type. You presented a strong case to the school counselors that you were just as prepared for AP classes as anyone else, enrolled in your desired classes, and excelled. Since then, AP classes have become more diversified at your school and there has even been a new inclusion training introduced for your district’s school counselors.
- When you were working as a camp counselor, the art teacher brought you two of your campers who were refusing to get along. To mediate the conflict, you spent long hours before bed talking to them individually, learning about their personal lives and family situation. By understanding where each camper came from, you were better equipped to help them reach a compromise and became a role model for both campers.
- As a member of your school’s Chinese organization, you were driven by your ethnic heritage to devote your lunch breaks to ensuring the smooth presentation of the Chinese culture show. You coordinated the performers, prepared refreshments, and collected tickets. You got through a great performance, even though a performer didn’t show and some of the food was delivered late. You weren’t on the leadership board or anything, but exhibited serious leadership, as both nights of the culture show sold out and hundreds of both Chinese and non-Chinese people were able to come together and celebrate your culture.
Like the last prompt, this prompt asks about a specific topic—creativity—but gives you wiggle room to expand your definition of that topic. By defining creativity as problem-solving, novel thinking, and artistic expression, this prompt basically says “get creative in how you define creativity!”
Additionally, this broad conception of creativity lets you choose if you want to write about your personal life or your academic life. A robotics student could write about their love of baking on the weekends or their quick thinking during a technical interview. A dance student could write about their love of adapting choreography from famous ballets or their innovative solution to their dance team’s lack of funds for their showcase. You have space to do what you want!
That said, because this prompt is so open, it is important to establish a focus early on. Try thinking about what is missing from your application. If you are worried that your application makes you seem hyper-academic, use this prompt to show how you have fun. If you are worried that you might be appearing like one of those students who just gets good grades because they have a good memory, use this prompt to show off your problem-solving skills.
Also, keep in mind that you don’t have to describe any skill in creative pursuits as you answer this prompt. The prompt asks you how you express your “creative side,” alluding to creative instinct, not creative talent. You could write about how you use painting to let out your emotions—but your paintings aren’t very good. You could write about dancing in the shower to get excited for your day—but one time you slipped and fell and hurt your elbow. Experiences like these could make for a great reflective essay, where you explore the human drive towards creative expression and your acceptance that you personally don’t have to be creatively inclined to let out creative energy.
Some examples:
- A math student writing about a time they devised a non-textbook method to proving theorems
- A creative writer describing how they close-read the ups-and-downs of classical music as an attempt to combat writers’ block and think of emotional trajectories for new stories
- An engineering student writing about cooking as a creative release where numbers don’t matter and intuition supersedes reason
- A psychology student writing about the limitations of quantitative data and describing a future approach to psychology that merges humanism and empiricism.
This is the kind of prompt where an answer either pops into your head or it doesn’t. The good news is that you can write a convincing essay either way. We all have great talents and skills—you just might have to dig a bit to identify the name of the talent/skill and figure out how to best describe it.
Some students have more obvious talents and skills than others. For example, if you are intending to be a college athlete, it makes sense to see your skill at your sport as your greatest talent or skill. Similarly, if you are being accepted into a highly-selective fine arts program, painting might feel like your greatest talent. These are completely reasonable to write about because, while obvious, they are also authentic!
The key to writing a convincing essay about an obvious skill is to use that skill to explore your personality, values, motivations, and ambitions. Start by considering what first drew you to your specialization. Was there a specific person? Something your life was missing that painting, hockey, or film satisfied? Were you brought up playing your sport or doing your craft because your parents wanted you to and you had to learn to love it? Or choose to love it? What was that process like? What do these experiences say about you? Next, consider how your relationship with your talent has evolved. Have you doubted your devotion at times? Have you wondered if you are good enough? Why do you keep going? On the other hand, is your talent your solace? The stable element in your life? Why do you need that?
The key is to elucidate why this activity is worth putting all your time into, and how your personality strengths are exhibited through your relationship to the activity.
Do not be put off by this prompt if you have not won any big awards or shown immense talent in something specific. All the prompt asks for is what you think is your greatest talent or skill. Some avenues of consideration for other students include:
- Think about aspects of your personality that might be considered a talent or skill. This might include being a peacemaker, being able to make people laugh during hard times, or having organization skills.
- Think about unique skills that you have developed through unique situations. These would be things like being really good at reading out loud because you spend summers with your grandfather who can no longer read, knowing traffic patterns because you volunteer as a crossing guard at the elementary school across the street that starts 45 minutes before the high school, or making really good pierogi because your babysitter as a child was Polish.
- Think about lessons you have learned through life experiences. A military baby might have a great skill for making new friends at new schools, a child of divorce might reflect on their ability to establish boundaries in what they are willing to communicate about with different people, and a student who has had to have multiple jobs in high school might be talented at multitasking and scheduling.
Make sure to also address how you have developed and demonstrated your selected talent. Do you put in small amounts of practice every day, or strenuous hours for a couple of short periods each year? Did a specific period of your life lead to the development of your talent or are you still developing it daily?
The purpose of college essays is to show your values and personality to admissions officers, which often includes exploring your past and how it informs your present and future. With a bit of creativity in how you define a “talent or skill,” this prompt can provide a great avenue for that exploration.
This prompt offers you two potential paths—discussing an educational opportunity or barrier. It is important that you limit yourself to one of these paths of exploration to keep your essay focused and cohesive.
Starting with the first option, you should think of an educational opportunity as anything that has added value to your educational experience and better prepared you for life and your career. Some examples could include:
- participation in an honors program
- enrollment in an academy geared toward your future profession
- a particularly enlightening conversation with a professional or teacher
- joining a cultural- or interest-based student coalition
- plenty of other opportunities
The phrasing “taken advantage of” implies the admissions committee’s desire for students who take the initiative. Admissions officers are more interested in students who sought out opportunities and who fought to engage with opportunities than students who were handed things. For example, a student who joined a career-advancement afterschool program in middle school could write about why they were initially interested in the program—perhaps they were struggling in a specific subject and didn’t want to fall behind because they had their sights set on getting into National Junior Honor Society, or their friend mentioned that the program facilitated internship opportunities and they thought they wanted to explore therapy as a potential career path.
On the other hand, if an opportunity was handed to you through family connections or a fortuitous introduction, explore what you did with that opportunity. For example, if a family member introduced you to an important producer because they knew you were interested in film, you could write about the notes you took during that meeting and how you have revisited the producer’s advice and used it since the meeting to find cheap equipment rentals and practice your craft.
If you choose to write about educational barriers you have faced, consider the personal characteristics and skills you called upon to overcome the challenge. How did the process of overcoming your educational barrier shape you as a person? What did you learn about yourself or the world? An added plus would be talking about passing it forward and helping those in your purview obtain the knowledge you did from your experiences.
Some examples of educational barriers could include:
- limited access to resources, materials, technology, or classes
- lacking educational role models
- struggles with deciding on a passion or career path
- financial struggles
One example of an interesting essay about educational barriers:
As a student at a school that did not offer any honors classes, you enrolled in online lectures to learn the subject you were passionate about — Human Geography. Afterward, you spoke to your school administrators about high-achieving students needing higher-level courses, and they agreed to talk to the local community college to start a pipeline for students like you.
Either way that you take this prompt, it can be used to position yourself as motivated and driven—exactly the type of student admissions officers are looking for!
This prompt is three-pronged. You must 1) identify a challenge 2) describe the steps you have taken to overcome the challenge and 3) connect the challenge to your academic achievement.
When approaching this prompt, it is best to consider these first and third aspects together so that you identify a challenge that connects to your academic life. If you simply pick any challenge you have experienced, when you get to the third part of the prompt, you may have to stretch your essay in ways that are unconvincing or feel inauthentic.
That said, remember that “academic achievement” reaches far beyond grades and exams. It can include things like:
- Deciding your career goals
- Balancing homework, jobs, and social/familial relationships
- Having enough time to devote to self-care
- Figuring out how you study/learn best
- Feeling comfortable asking for help when you need it
You should begin brainstorming challenges and hardships that you have experienced and overcome. These could include financial hardships, familial circumstances, personal illness, or learning disabilities. Challenges could also be less structural—things like feeling like you are living in a sibling’s shadow, struggles with body image, or insecurity. While it is important that your challenge was significant, it matters much more that you discuss your challenge with thoughtful reflection and maturity.
Some ways to take this prompt include:
- Writing about how overcoming a challenge taught you a skill that led to academic success — for example, a high-achieving student who struggles with anxiety was forced to take time off from school after an anxiety attack and learned the importance of giving oneself a break
- Writing about a challenge that temporarily hindered your academic success and reflecting on it — for example, a student who experienced a death in the family could have had a semester where they almost failed English because reading led to negative thought spirals instead of plot retention
- Writing about how a challenge humbled you and gave you a new perspective on your academics — for example, a student with a part-time job who helps support her family missed a shift because she was studying for a test and realized that she needed to ask her teachers for help and explain her home situation
As you describe the steps you have taken to overcome your selected challenge, you will want to include both tangible and intangible steps. This means that you will need to discuss your emotions, growth, and development, as well as what you learned through overcoming the challenge. Was your challenge easy to overcome or did it take a few tries? Do you feel you have fully overcome your challenge or is it a work in progress? If you have fully overcome the challenge, what do you do differently now? Or do you just see things differently now? If you were to experience the same challenge again, what would you have learned from before?
Here are some detailed examples:
- Your parents underwent a bitter, drawn-out divorce that deeply scarred you and your siblings, especially your little brother who was attending elementary school at the time. He was constantly distraught and melancholy and seemed to be falling further and further behind in his schoolwork. You took care of him, but at the cost of your grades plummeting. However, through this trial, you committed yourself to protecting your family at all costs. You focused on computer science in high school, hoping to major in it and save up enough money for his college tuition by the time he applies. Through this mission, your resolve strengthened and reflected in your more efficient and excellent performance in class later on.
- Your race was the most significant challenge you faced growing up. In school, teachers did not value your opinion nor did they believe in you, as evidenced by their preferential treatment of students of other races. To fight back against this discrimination, you talked to other students of the same race and established an association, pooling together resources and providing a supportive network of people to others in need of counseling regarding this issue.
The first step for approaching this prompt is fun and easy—think about an academic subject that inspires you. This part of the essay is about emotional resonance, so go with your gut and don’t overthink it. What is your favorite subject? What subject do you engage with in the media in your free time? What subject seeps into your conversations with friends and family on the weekends?
Keep in mind that high school subjects are often rather limited. The span of “academic subjects” at the university level is much less limited. Some examples of academic subjects include eighteenth-century literature, political diplomacy, astronomy, Italian film and television, botany, Jewish culture and history, mobile robotics, musical theater, race and class in urban environments, gender and sexuality, and much more.
Once you’ve decided what subject you are most interested in and inspired by, think about a tangible example of how you have furthered your interest in the subject. Some common ways students further their interests include:
- Reading about your interest
- Engaging with media (television, film, social media) about your interest
- Volunteering with organizations related to your interest
- Founding organizations related to your interest
- Reaching out to professionals with your academic interest
- Using your interest in interdisciplinary ways
- Research in your field of interest
- Internships in your field of interest
While you should include these kinds of tangible examples, do not forget to explain how your love for the subject drives the work you do, because, with an essay like this, the why can easily get lost in describing the what . Admissions officers need both.
A few examples:
- You found your US government class fascinatingly complex, so you decided to campaign for a Congressional candidate who was challenging the incumbent in your district. You canvassed in your local community, worked at the campaign headquarters, and gathered voter data whilst performing various administrative duties. Though the work was difficult, you enjoyed a sense of fulfillment that came from being part of history.
- Last year you fell in love with the play Suddenly Last Summer and decided to see what career paths were available for dramatic writing. You reached out to the contact on your local theater’s website, were invited to start attending their guest lecturer series, and introduced yourself to a lecturer one week who ended up helping you score a spot in a Young Dramatic Writers group downtown.
- The regenerative power of cells amazed you, so you decided to take AP Biology to learn more. Eventually, you mustered up the courage to email a cohort of biology professors at your local university. One professor responded, and agreed to let you assist his research for the next few months on the microorganism C. Elegans.
- You continued to develop apps and games even after AP Computer Science concluded for the year. Eventually, you became good enough to land an internship at a local startup due to your self-taught knowledge of various programming languages.
With regards to structure, you might try thinking about this essay in a past/present/future manner where you consider your past engagement with your interest and how it will affect your future at a UC school or as an adult in society. This essay could also become an anecdotal/narrative essay that centers around the story of you discovering your academic interest, or a reflective essay that dives deep into the details of why you are drawn to your particular academic subject.
Whatever way you take it, try to make your essay unique—either through your subject matter, your structure, or your writing style!
College essay prompts often engage with the word “community.” As an essay writer, it is important to recognize that your community can be as large, small, formal, or informal as you want it to be. Your school is obviously a community you belong to, but your local grocery store, the nearby pet adoption center you volunteer at, your apartment building, or an internet group can also be communities. Even larger social groups that you are a part of, like your country or your ethnicity, can be a community.
The important part of your response here is not the community you identify with but rather the way you describe your role in that community. What do you bring to your community that is special? What would be missing without you?
Some responses could include describing how you serve as a role model in your community, how you advocate for change in your community, how you are a support system for other community members, or how you correct the community when it is veering away from its values and principles.
Here are some fleshed-out examples of how this essay could take shape, using the earlier referenced communities:
- A student writes about the local grocery store in his neighborhood. Each Sunday, he picks up his family’s groceries and then goes to the pharmacy in the back to get his grandmother’s medication. The pharmacist was a close friend of his grandmother’s when she was young, so the student routinely gives the pharmacist a detailed update about his grandmother’s life. The student recognizes the value in his serving as a link to connect these two individuals who, due to aging, cannot be together physically.
- An animal-loving student volunteers one Saturday each month at the pet adoption center in their city’s downtown district. They have always been an extremely compassionate person and view the young kittens as a community that deserves to be cared for. This caring instinct also contributes to their interactions with their peers and their desire to make large-scale positive social change in the world.
Your response to this prompt will be convincing if you discuss your underlying motives for the service you have done, and in turn, demonstrate the positive influence you have made. That said, do not be afraid to talk about your actions even if they did not produce a sweeping change; as long as the effort was genuine, change is change, no matter the scale. This essay is more about values and reflection than it is about the effects of your efforts.
Lastly, if you are discussing a specific service you did for your community, you might want to touch on what you learned through your service action or initiative, and how you will continue to learn in the future. Here are a few examples:
- Passionate about classical music, you created a club that taught classical and instrumental music at local elementary schools. You knew that the kids did not have access to such resources, so you wanted to broaden their exposure as a high school senior had done for you when you were in middle school. You encouraged these elementary schoolers to fiddle with the instruments and lobbied for a music program to be implemented at the school. Whether the proposal gets approved or not, the kids have now known something they might never have known otherwise.
- Working at your local library was mundane at times, but in the long run, you realized that you were facilitating the exchange of knowledge and protecting the intellectual property of eminent scholars. Over time, you found ways to liven up the spirit of the library by leading arts and crafts time and booking puppet shows for little kids whose parents were still at work. The deep relationships you forged with the kids eventually blossomed into a bond of mentorship and mutual respect.
Be authentic and humble in your response to this essay! Make sure it feels like you made your community a better place because community is a value of yours, not just so that you could write about it in a college essay.
This is the most open-ended any question can get. You have the freedom to write about anything you want! That said, make sure that, no matter what you do with this prompt, your focus can be summarized into two sentences that describe the uniqueness of your candidacy.
The process we recommend for responding to open-ended prompts with clarity involves the following steps:
1. On a blank piece of paper, jot down any and every idea — feelings, phrases, and keywords — that pop into your head after reading this prompt. Why are you unique?
2. Narrow your ideas down to one topic. The two examples we will use are a student writing about how her habit of pausing at least five seconds before she responds to someone else’s opinion is emblematic of her thoughtfulness and a student whose interest in researching the history of colonialism in the Caribbean is emblematic of their commitment to justice.
3. Outline the structure of your essay, and plan out content for an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
4. Before you start writing your essay, write one or two sentences that summarize how you would like the admissions officers to perceive you based on this essay. These sentences will not be in your final product, but will help you to maintain a focus. For our examples, this would be something like “Natalie’s habit of gathering her thoughts before responding to other people’s opinions allows her to avoid undesired complications and miscommunications in her social interactions. This has not only helped her maintain strong relationships with all the staff members of the clubs she leads, but will also help her navigate the social environments that she will face in the professional world.” A summary for the student writing about their interest in the history of colonialism could be “Jonathan has always been highly compassionate and sympathetic by nature. When they found out about the historical injustices of colonialism in the Caribbean through the book The Black Jacobins , they realized that compassion is what is missing from politics. Now, they are inspired to pursue a political science degree to ultimately have a political career guided by compassion.”
5. Finally, write an essay dedicated to constructing the image you devised in step 4. This can be achieved through a number of different structures! For example, Natalie could use an anecdote of a time when she spoke too soon and caused someone else pain, then could reflect on how she learned the lesson to take at least five seconds before responding and how that decision has affected her life. Jonathan could create an image of the future where they are enacting local policies based on compassion. It is important to keep in mind that you do not want to be repetitive, but you must stay on topic so that admissions officers do not get distracted and forget the image that you are attempting to convey.
As exemplified by the examples we provided, a good way to approach this prompt is to think of a quality, value, or personality trait of yours that is fundamental to who you are and appealing to admissions officers, then connect it to a specific activity, habit, pet peeve, anecdote, or another tangible example that you can use to ground your essay in reality. Use the tangible to describe the abstract, and convince admissions officers that you would be a valuable asset to their UC school!
Where to Get Your UC Essays Edited
With hundreds of thousands of applicants each year, many receiving top scores and grades, getting into top UC schools is no small feat. This is why excelling in the personal-insight questions is key to presenting yourself as a worthwhile candidate. Answering these prompts can be difficult, but ultimately very rewarding, and CollegeVine is committed to helping you along that journey. Check out these UC essay examples for more writing inspiration.
If you want to get your essays edited, we also have free peer essay review , where you can get feedback from another student. You can also improve your own writing skills by editing other students’ essays.
You can also receive expert essay review by advisors who have helped students get into their dream schools. You can book a review with an expert to receive notes on your topic, grammar, and essay structure to make your essay stand out to admissions officers. Haven’t started writing your essay yet? Advisors on CollegeVine also offer expert college counseling packages . You can purchase a package to get one-on-one guidance on any aspect of the college application process, including brainstorming and writing essays.
Related CollegeVine Blog Posts
University of California, Berkeley | UC Berkeley
- Cost & scholarships
- Essay prompt
Want to see your chances of admission at University of California, Berkeley | UC Berkeley?
We take every aspect of your personal profile into consideration when calculating your admissions chances.
University of California, Berkeley | UC Berkeley’s 2023-24 Essay Prompts
Select-a-prompt short responses.
Please respond to any 4 of the 8 questions below.We realize that not all questions apply to all applicants, so be sure to select the 4 questions that you believe give us the best information about you.All 8 questions are given equal consideration in the application review process. Responses to each question should be between 250-350 words.
Describe an example of your leadership experience in which you have positively influenced others, helped resolve disputes or contributed to group efforts over time.
Every person has a creative side, and it can be expressed in many ways: problem solving, original and innovative thinking, and artistically, to name a few. Describe how you express your creative side.
What would you say is your greatest talent or skill? How have you developed and demonstrated that talent over time?
Describe how you have taken advantage of a significant educational opportunity or worked to overcome an educational barrier you have faced.
Describe the most significant challenge you have faced and the steps you have taken to overcome this challenge. How has this challenge affected your academic achievement?
Think about an academic subject that inspires you. Describe how you have furthered this interest inside and/or outside of the classroom.
What have you done to make your school or your community a better place?
Beyond what has already been shared in your application, what do you believe makes you stand out as a strong candidate for admissions to the University of California?
What will first-time readers think of your college essay?
Essays help us learn about who you are as a person and how you will add to our community. We seek candidates from a broad range of industries, backgrounds, cultures, and lived experiences.
Our distinctive culture is defined by four key principles - Question the Status Quo, Confidence Without Attitude, Students Always, and Beyond Yourself. We encourage you to reflect on your experiences, values, and passions so that you may craft thoughtful and authentic responses that demonstrate your alignment with our principles.
Below are the required essays, supplemental essays, and optional essays for the Fall 2024-2025 application cycle.
Required Essay #1
What makes you feel alive when you are doing it, and why?
(300 words max)
Required Essay #2
What are your short-term and long-term career goals, and how will an MBA from Haas help you achieve those goals?
Short-term career goals should be achievable within 3-5 years post-MBA, whereas long-term goals may span a decade or more and encompass broader professional aspirations.
Experience with Diversity, Equity or Inclusion
One of our goals at Berkeley Haas is to develop leaders who value diversity and to create an inclusive environment in which people from different ethnicities, genders, lived experiences, and national origins feel welcomed and supported.
Describe any experience or exposure you have in the area of diversity, equity, inclusion, justice, and belonging whether through community organizations, personal, or in the workplace?
Candidates seeking consideration for mission-aligned fellowships may use this space to reflect on their commitment to the mission of those fellowships.
Video Essay
The Berkeley MBA program develops leaders who embody our four Defining Leadership Principles . Briefly introduce yourself to the admissions committee, explain which Defining Leadership Principle resonates most with you, and tell us how you have exemplified the principle in your personal or professional life.
Please review the Defining Leadership Principles in advance and take time to prepare your answer before recording. You will be able to test your audio-visual connection before recording. Video essays should last 1-2 minutes and may not exceed 2 minutes.
Optional Essays
The admissions team takes a holistic approach to application review and seeks to understand all aspects of a candidate’s character, qualifications, and experiences. We will consider achievements in the context of the opportunities available to a candidate. Some applicants may have faced hardships or unusual life circumstances, and we will consider the maturity, perseverance, and thoughtfulness with which they have responded to and/or overcome them.
Optional Information #1
We invite you to help us better understand the context of your opportunities and achievements.
Optional Information #2
This section should only be used to convey relevant information not addressed elsewhere in your application. This may include explanation of employment gaps, academic aberrations, supplemental coursework, etc. You are encouraged to use bullet points where appropriate.
Supplemental Information
- If you have not provided a letter of recommendation from your current supervisor, please explain. If not applicable, enter N/A.
- Name of organization or activity
- Nature of organization or activity
- Size of organization
- Dates of involvement
- Offices held
- Average number of hours spent per week
- List full-time and part-time jobs held during undergraduate or graduate studies indicating the employer, job title, employment dates, location, and the number of hours worked per week for each position held prior to the completion of your degree.
- If you have ever been subject to academic discipline, placed on probation, suspended, or required to withdraw from any college or university, please explain. If not, please enter N/A. (An affirmative response to this question does not automatically disqualify you from admission.)
Extracurricular Supplement Tips
Cindy Jennings Millette, Senior Associate Director of Full-time Admissions, shares how we evaluate extracurricular and community involvement.
Watching video: Extracurricular Supplement Tips
Take the next step.
The Haas Full-time MBA is our flagship offering, designed to give students the tools to become leaders and earn their MBAs. Learn from world-renowned faculty as well as our truly global cohort of students. All this in the heart of Silicon Valley.
IMAGES
VIDEO
COMMENTS
Here's 18 outstanding UC Berkeley essay examples from admitted students. See exactly what these Cal students did right, and avoid making the same mistakes. EssaysThatWorked.com
Every UC school you apply to receives the same application and essays, so it’s important that your responses accurately represent your personality and writing abilities. In this post, we’ll share some UC essay examples and go over what they did well and where they could improve.
UC essays, or the UC Personal Insight Questions, require a very particular style and tone. Here, we go through outstanding essay examples for each of the 8 UC essay prompts. To help you write your own, we've asked former admissions officers to annotate, comment on, and grade every single essay.
For the 2023-2024 UC Berkeley essays, it’s essential to make sure that the structure aligns with the prompt’s requirements and effectively showcases the applicant’s strengths, experiences, and fit for the university.
A step-by-step guide to conquering all UC personal insight questions (PIQs), with examples of all UC essay prompts and an analysis of successful UC essays
Here are 20 UC essay examples (also called UC Personal Insight Essay Examples) from students of ours that have been accepted to at least UCLA or UC Berkeley. If you have writer’s block and want to jumpstart your UC personal insight essay writing process, then these UC essay examples will most definitely help :).
Applying to UC schools this fall? This guide walks you through how to write each of the eight essay prompts in order to maximize your chances of acceptance.
Applying to University of California, Berkeley | UC Berkeley and trying to find all the correct essay prompts for 2023-24? Find them here, along with free guidance on how to write the essays.
We encourage you to reflect on your experiences, values, and passions so that you may craft thoughtful and authentic responses that demonstrate your alignment with our principles. Below are the required essays, supplemental essays, and optional essays for the Fall 2024-2025 application cycle.
When you’re responding to a UC essay, look at the criteria for augmented review or the brainstorming guide for clues into what they’re really asking you. The UCs use your essays to understand the context of your application.